Welcome!!

Become a Member of our site to be able to post and join in on the conversations! Guests are welcomed, our threads are not locked.

A site for fans of The Bachelor & The Bachelorette who enjoy
sleuthing and discussing Spoilers and Non Spoilers!

Discuss a variety of other shows, as well as International Bachelor and Bachelorette!

Please read the Rules!

bbspoilerfans@outlook.com

http://www.bachandbachettefans.net/f1-about-our-site-rules-guidelines

Enjoy!

Fun Times with Bachelorette 7

Page 6 of 25 Previous  1 ... 5, 6, 7 ... 15 ... 25  Next

View previous topic View next topic Go down

Re: Fun Times with Bachelorette 7

Post by Love_Me on Tue Jun 14, 2011 6:17 pm

The Bachelorette: Chris Harrison Announces the Search for the Next Bentley

by Lily Sparks
TV.com Staff Writer
06/14/11 12:00 PM

Hello, Chris Harrison here. You may know me as the forthright host of The Bachelorette. Or you may know me from my stunning floor routines at my All-Nite Roller Rink.












I hope I’ve made it absolutely clear that Bentley was a villain, a cad and one of the sweetest ratings boosts The Bachelorette
has enjoyed in these last ten seasons. When he left last week, Ashley
was devastated, but not nearly as devastated as I was. Watching him go
was like opening a suitcase of money into a high wind. Ashley was not
the only one who spent that dark night scream-sobbing into a satin
duvet.












And so I knew going into this week's episode that our goal would be to
find a Replacement Bentley, a fill-in villain who would congratulate
himself for manipulating and hurting Ashley. And in my own experience,
nothing will bring a man down to his most unforgiving nature faster than
the heavy heat of Thailand.












Ashley’s choice for her first overseas date was a moist-looking lad by
the name of Constantine. He suggested they tour the local village, and I
had high hopes that he intended to steal her jewelry to buy a lady-boy
or cast lots in a game of chance just like Bentley would, but he stayed
by her side, listening patiently to her shrill female patter. He dared
my contempt further by bragging about the open attitude he’s adopted
since his last relationship, which has allowed him to love his family
deeper than he’s loved them before, and allowed me to nap deeper than
I’ve ever napped in the bushes off-camera while listening to the feed of
pure BORING that was streaming through their microphone packs.












Ashley put her gigolos to work renovating an orphanage on the group
date, despite my behind-the-scenes protests. Warm-hearted quality time
with orphans is going to put butts in seats, not matter how badly ABC
needs to show it is a force for good.


Luckily, there’s this guy:












His tone of unctuous insincerity was sweet, sweet like tender slices of
honeydew being rubbed against my ear. Could he be my future Bentley?
Thick William had been my frontrunner, but he seems to be hiding from
Ashley at the moment, probably in shame.












A Bentley knows not shame. And then of course, Ashley has been pressing lips to this:












His pink cheeks in confessional and earnest affection are useless to me.












This works only if he admidts that he wanted to drag her by her hair.












At least Ashley’s date with Ames was quite intriguing.












Why would a man who can afford to go to Thailand twice apply for this
show? He’s been to 70 countries, is probably wealthy, speaks with charm
and correct grammar. What has brought him to my Circus of the Damned? Is
he spy? An adventurer? Could he be a usurper? Does he mean to unseat me
and rule in my place?!











In our weekly deliberation, I drove the long acupuncture needles of
memory straight into Ashley’s heart, repeatedly bringing up Bentley. At
the mere mention of his name I could feel the ratings surge. Ashley
assured me she was moving forward.












Just when I was ready to confer “New Bentley” status on Ryan, he dropped
his tightly-clutched mask of sanity at the cocktail party. After a
contestant called his non-stop manic cheerfulness “disingenuous,” he
started to unravel.











I’ve seen this kind of breakdown happen to my comrades in the foxholes
of my annual Paintball Royale, usually after three or four days of
continuous vigilance and action. Such a mental fugue is called “Sh*tting
Your Pants With Your Mouth,” and the only remedy involves stuffing the
victim’s mouth with ice and then slapping him square across the face.
Bentley may have been a sociopath, but he took a keen pleasure in hiding
it.



So, as I explained to the producers in our Thai war room meeting
session, we now have four obvious frontrunners, but no clear Replacement
Bentley, according to the readings of my proprietary Bentley Meter:















































Our objective is clear: We must invoke or involve Bentley in each
episode, while grooming one of these four men into a lying piece of
human garbage to take his place. And, of course, find true love for
whastherface.




QUESTIONS:


... Who do you think is the most Bentley-esque?


... Who is on the show for "the right reasons"?


... Are there right reasons to be on this show?


…. Who will make it to the final four?
avatar
Love_Me

Female Posts : 32396
Join date : 2011-03-22

Back to top Go down

Re: Fun Times with Bachelorette 7

Post by mnmhughes on Tue Jun 14, 2011 6:20 pm

That is the funniest thing I have read all day! I'm dying! :woah-hoo: rotfl
avatar
mnmhughes

Female Posts : 8112
Join date : 2011-03-23

Back to top Go down

Re: Fun Times with Bachelorette 7

Post by realityfan26 on Tue Jun 14, 2011 7:30 pm

Jello - I'm going with 31, but think it should 632!!
Love me -Spot on!!
avatar
realityfan26

Posts : 1136
Join date : 2011-05-19

Back to top Go down

Re: Fun Times with Bachelorette 7

Post by Guest on Wed Jun 15, 2011 1:14 pm

AWESOME job Love me!!! yes That is hysterical!!

Guest
Guest


Back to top Go down

Re: Fun Times with Bachelorette 7

Post by jello1592 on Wed Jun 15, 2011 1:25 pm

GAME TIME!

How many times do you think the name "Bentley" was said during last nights episode? (including previews, VO's and PI's)

A) 17
B) 9
C) 23
D) 31
E) 20
avatar
jello1592

Female Posts : 3284
Join date : 2011-05-24
Age : 26
Location : Philadelphia

Back to top Go down

Re: Fun Times with Bachelorette 7

Post by Starshine_16 on Wed Jun 15, 2011 1:27 pm

Absolutely 31.

I counted...
avatar
Starshine_16

Female Posts : 1017
Join date : 2011-05-31
Age : 31

Back to top Go down

Re: Fun Times with Bachelorette 7

Post by CarrieA on Wed Jun 15, 2011 1:47 pm

Yeah I would have to say 31 because I stopped counting after 20 rotfl
avatar
CarrieA

Female Posts : 3478
Join date : 2011-03-22

Back to top Go down

Re: Fun Times with Bachelorette 7

Post by Love_Me on Wed Jun 15, 2011 3:37 pm

BachFanInOrl wrote:AWESOME job Love me!!! That is hysterical!!


Lily Sparks @ TV.com is hilarious. I think she also did one about last weeks episode. I will try and post it later. :D
avatar
Love_Me

Female Posts : 32396
Join date : 2011-03-22

Back to top Go down

Re: Fun Times with Bachelorette 7

Post by Guest on Wed Jun 15, 2011 3:56 pm

Thanks so much. I have tears laughing from reading that. rotfl

Guest
Guest


Back to top Go down

Re: Fun Times with Bachelorette 7

Post by jello1592 on Wed Jun 15, 2011 4:02 pm

GAME TIME!

I have taken some memorable quotes for Monday night's episode and take some time to try and guess who said that quote! Each bachelor is used only once as well as Ashley. Have fun! (If ya'll know me at all...you should know I saved the best quote for last ;)

P.S If you want to PM me you'r answer that is fine!

“Peace and Productivity”

“Everyone is kind of going after the same piece of fruit”

“If there is anybody here today who is trying to make themselves visible and attract attention, it is Ryan"

“I am not going anywhere, you are going to have to force me to go”

“I have never been to Thailand. I have never been to any place in Asia so I am so excited”

“I am hoping that all of the things that made Ashley sad this week she can leave behind and I think there is no better place to start over, than Thailand”

“I am not holding back and I do not want you to be insecure about anything. I am literally like having a good time and I am wanting to be here and I am wanting to get to know you better”

“For Ashley to organize this and put this together it’s huge and helping out the orphanage, it’s awesome”

“GOOBER!”

“It was the perfect ending to this date. We had such a blast doing the work and actually getting things done for the kids”

“I am definitely bummed. I haven’t had any 1 on 1 dates so I am realllllly bummed you know? We are here to get some time with Ashley and Constantine got it. I hope it rains”

“I do feel like it is a situation that takes a while to get over and there have certainly been times in the past where I was not ready. But I have taken a lot of time for myself and have come to a completely differently self awareness and although I am very happy to have what I had and obviously sad that I lost it, I am at a completely different place right now and it is always going to be a part of me”

“You surprised me today too. I don’t know I was painting a mural but I felt like you were kind of buzzing around me a little more than usual”
avatar
jello1592

Female Posts : 3284
Join date : 2011-05-24
Age : 26
Location : Philadelphia

Back to top Go down

Re: Fun Times with Bachelorette 7

Post by agentcurls on Wed Jun 15, 2011 4:38 pm

[quote="jello1592"]GAME TIME!

I have taken some memorable quotes for Monday night's episode and take some time to try and guess who said that quote! Each bachelor is used only once as well as Ashley. Have fun! (If ya'll know me at all...you should know I saved the best quote for last ;)

P.S If you want to PM me you'r answer that is fine!

“Peace and Productivity” Ryan

“Everyone is kind of going after the same piece of fruit” Blake

“If there is anybody here today who is trying to make themselves visible and attract attention, it is Ryan" Lucas

“I am not going anywhere, you are going to have to force me to go” JP

“I have never been to Thailand. I have never been to any place in Asia so I am so excited” Ash

“I am hoping that all of the things that made Ashley sad this week she can leave behind and I think there is no better place to start over, than Thailand” William

“I am not holding back and I do not want you to be insecure about anything. I am literally like having a good time and I am wanting to be here and I am wanting to get to know you better” Constantine

“For Ashley to organize this and put this together it’s huge and helping out the orphanage, it’s awesome” Ames

“GOOBER!” JP

“It was the perfect ending to this date. We had such a blast doing the work and actually getting things done for the kids” Ben C.

“I am definitely bummed. I haven’t had any 1 on 1 dates so I am realllllly bummed you know? We are here to get some time with Ashley and Constantine got it. I hope it rains” Nick

“I do feel like it is a situation that takes a while to get over and there have certainly been times in the past where I was not ready. But I have taken a lot of time for myself and have come to a completely differently self awareness and although I am very happy to have what I had and obviously sad that I lost it, I am at a completely different place right now and it is always going to be a part of me” West

“You surprised me today too. I don’t know I was painting a mural but I felt like you were kind of buzzing around me a little more than usual” Ben F
avatar
agentcurls

Posts : 2011
Join date : 2011-06-08

Back to top Go down

Re: Fun Times with Bachelorette 7

Post by Princess81320 on Wed Jun 15, 2011 5:11 pm

jello1592 wrote:GAME TIME!

I have taken some memorable quotes for Monday night's episode and take some time to try and guess who said that quote! Each bachelor is used only once as well as Ashley. Have fun! (If ya'll know me at all...you should know I saved the best quote for last ;)

P.S If you want to PM me you'r answer that is fine!

“Peace and Productivity” Ryan P

“Everyone is kind of going after the same piece of fruit” Blake

“If there is anybody here today who is trying to make themselves visible and attract attention, it is Ryan" Ben F

“I am not going anywhere, you are going to have to force me to go” JP

“I have never been to Thailand. I have never been to any place in Asia so I am so excited” Ashley

“I am hoping that all of the things that made Ashley sad this week she can leave behind and I think there is no better place to start over, than Thailand” Lucas

“I am not holding back and I do not want you to be insecure about anything. I am literally like having a good time and I am wanting to be here and I am wanting to get to know you better” Constantine

“For Ashley to organize this and put this together it’s huge and helping out the orphanage, it’s awesome” JP

“GOOBER!” Lucas

“It was the perfect ending to this date. We had such a blast doing the work and actually getting things done for the kids” JP

“I am definitely bummed. I haven’t had any 1 on 1 dates so I am realllllly bummed you know? We are here to get some time with Ashley and Constantine got it. I hope it rains” Nick

“I do feel like it is a situation that takes a while to get over and there have certainly been times in the past where I was not ready. But I have taken a lot of time for myself and have come to a completely differently self awareness and although I am very happy to have what I had and obviously sad that I lost it, I am at a completely different place right now and it is always going to be a part of me” West

“You surprised me today too. I don’t know I was painting a mural but I felt like you were kind of buzzing around me a little more than usual” Ben F
avatar
Princess81320

Female Posts : 661
Join date : 2011-06-01
Age : 23
Location : Ohio

Back to top Go down

Re: Fun Times with Bachelorette 7

Post by Sponsored content


Sponsored content


Back to top Go down

Page 6 of 25 Previous  1 ... 5, 6, 7 ... 15 ... 25  Next

View previous topic View next topic Back to top

Fun Times with Bachelorette 7

Permissions in this forum:
You cannot reply to topics in this forum