Andi Dorfman & Josh Murray - Bachelorette 10 - General Discussion #2

Yes, there is something markedly off about the Josh family dynamics imo. Josh could somehow just never appropriately navigate the love and attention he was supposed to give his future wife and his family, notably his mom imo. It's best exemplified by his mom showing up this weekend to attend all the events instead of Andi. If it works for them all, that's great, but I understand why Andi couldn't/wouldn't/didn't correctly fit into the picture as things stood.

GuardianAngel wrote:I don't think a guy should ever refrain from displaying his love for his mother. The love you have for your parents is a different love that you would have for your spouse.

I love that pic, and the fact that he had no hesitation in sharing it publicly.

Anyone's fiance/husb/wife should be proud that their better half has a good relationship with their parents. At the end of the day, your family will always be there and support you, unlike your b/f g/f etc.

I can definitely see Andi having an problem with that pic.

GA, I agree with you about displaying affection for a parent.  I have always heard it said that you should observe how a man treats his mother, as that will be a good indicator as to how he will treat his wife.  I realize that that is not always the case, but I do think that when it comes to Josh, it does apply.  And, you don't have to be a mama's boy in order to show love, respect and honor for your mother.

I do suspect that the prospect of Josh fearing that he would lose his mother to cancer, only to have her survive, probably made their relationship, their bond, even closer.  As a parent, I feel that showing your child unconditional love is one of the greatest gifts that you can give them.  That is what Josh needs right now, so it makes perfect sense to me that he is surrounding himself with family and friends.

If Andi did indeed resent Josh's close relationship with his mother, or anyone in his family, then that was a big red flag for me.  I guess I don't see the problem with Josh's relationship with his mother, but I did not follow him or Andi afterwards.  So, I don't know that much about him. But, perhaps there is too much being made about what he wrote regarding his love for his mother.  

Alanna wrote:Yes, there is something markedly off about the Josh family dynamics imo. Josh could somehow just never appropriately navigate the love and attention he was supposed to give his future wife and his family, notably his mom imo. It's best exemplified by his mom showing up this weekend to attend all the events instead of Andi. If it works for them all, that's great, but I understand why Andi couldn't/wouldn't/didn't correctly fit into the picture as things stood.

Read my mind.

Are we allowed to discuss the family? I thought no but it looks like we kinda are?

Kinda yes in all threads. No A/K what so ever anywhere on this forum.

bleuberry wrote:

Alanna wrote:Yes, there is something markedly off about the Josh family dynamics imo. Josh could somehow just never appropriately navigate the love and attention he was supposed to give his future wife and his family, notably his mom imo. It's best exemplified by his mom showing up this weekend to attend all the events instead of Andi. If it works for them all, that's great, but I understand why Andi couldn't/wouldn't/didn't correctly fit into the picture as things stood.

Read my mind.

Are we allowed to discuss the family? I thought no but it looks like we kinda are?

For me, there's a fine line between loving your family/parents/mother and choosing them over a life for yourself with a spouse. Like I said, it was only one picture, but it made me uncomfortable.... so I can only imagine how it made Andi feel.

I haven't followed their relationship as closely as most of you, but to hear that MM showed up to attend events with Josh this weekend is weird to me.

I think she believes that's her place. Lol

Bringing this post over from the fan thread..

@Steel2009 wrote:
More crazy thoughts on my part.......scratch scratch but Do you guys think MM and Andi ever got along? based on SM activity alone, it seems there was some conflict between josh and his mom last year.

-Josh unfollow his own mom a couple months ago but it seems after a while they made up and he's following her again... He even went as far as posting this pic which Andi favorited.  This tells me something happened but they fixed it...
https://twitter.com/jmurbulldog/status/539495327116439552?lang=en

-I could be wrong  but it looks like Andi never followed MM on ig or Twitter.  I don't have FB to tell

-MM breakup statement: I'm now also wondering if a little premature.  How does she know they will not get back together?

I don't know if the breakup really had anything to do with Josh's family dynamics. Yes, they're close, but if SM activity is anything to go by, then they seemed quite welcoming to Andi. There seemed to be something weird going on for a while, but it could've been about anything, not Andi necessarily. If she felt uncomfortable with them, then it's probably because she couldn't see forever with Josh. You don't want to get close to people just to never see them again.

SueSt wrote:

nannymargie wrote:

mamahamme wrote:Maybe so I remember in the hotel before the contestants went to the mansion Josh was interviewed and the first thing he said he was looking for was someone who is sophisticated. That might be hard to find plus that could be one of the reasons it has taken so long to find someone.

Josh has always said that he is picky when it comes to finding someone to settle down with.  It had taken him 5 years before he found it in Andi.  Of course Andi provided a few things he wasn't looking for.   So does Josh change what he wants in a woman or does he himself reflect on what they had and feels he should give this relationship another chance?  The next few weeks and months will have us on edge wondering if it's God's will to make this relationship new again or lead them on different paths.

What kind of scares me is that will Josh put his family first again over what he wants?  

What I see is that Josh is retreating to the love and comfort of his family after his failed relationship with Andi.  They know, love and accept him; he's himself with them.  It makes sense and seems sort of normal to me.  

On the other hand, the picture Josh tweeted of him and his mom in early December really struck me... It had the caption: I love my mama more than anything .  And I thought at the time if I was Andi I would not like it.  The tweet actually made me uncomfortable.  For a 'grown ass man' I thought it was a bit OTT, an almost childish statement from a mama's boy ... and we don't know exactly what was going on between J&A at the time, but in hindsight, I think we can say, it probably wasn't good.

I agree Sue.. When I first saw the tweet, I thought "good for him" because he had unfollowed his mom and was now following her again. When I saw that Andi favorited the tweet....i wondered the if there was something more to the tweet. It's was weird.

I'm not sure if they got along or not but I just have to say if I had a viewing party for my sons engagement and in front of all my family and friends it came out that his soon to be bride slept with someone else the night before,,,, nope never happen we would never be close. As a mother I could not fathom being as embarrassed as MM was and I might play nice with the bride but I could not be friends with someone who disrespected my son like that. I don't buy the I didn't know if it was Josh or Nick at that point. Guess what tv show or not if I'm not sure which guy I like I don't sleep with either one, I have more respect for myself. That's why I think we see MM rushing to Josh's side and to announce stuff, she is probably beyond relieved that there done

Eta: I give MM a ton of respect for still saying nice things about Andi and posting pics of her. I wouldn't have been able to be that big of person.

Funny how a few weeks ago we were speculating that she was pregnant and now we don't even think they were together then

Josh Allan Murray @jmurbulldog · 34s 35 seconds ago
Off to Tampa with my mama, can't wait to see my baby Sabel #MansBestFriend

I love that he's moving on with his life and letting his fans know he's ok. I bet he misses his pup so much