Chris Soules - Whitney Bischoff - Bachelor 19 - Discussion

^^^ I agree.  I also don't like how he said they are taking a break on the "relationship stuff."  When you truly love someone, you are there for them.  Through thick and thin, ups and downs. etc. Not surprising to me at all that Chris is acting like this.  Again weird.  JMHO  ;)

soccermom333 wrote:^^^ I agree.  I also don't like how he said they are taking a break on the "relationship stuff."  When you truly love someone, you are there for them.  Through thick and thin, ups and downs. etc.     Not surprising to me at all that Chris is acting like this.  Again weird.  JMHO  ;)

What is worse to me is that she is letting him get away with it!  For all the Cat was strong stuff, as soon as Sean realized how tough the show was on him and Cat he backed off of all put the necessary things so he could focus on all that relationship stuff.

Have to say though, I blame Whitney, she moved to CA to be with him and what is she now, he glorified roommate/housekeeper?  Pathetic and she is letting him get away with it.  No pity for Whit from me, stand up for yourself woman.  Be that strong woman you claim to be.

BTW, if a man says he wants a break from relationship stuff isn't that the same as saying he doesn't want to be in the relationship?

I sometimes wonder if he's trying to push her away. I'm sure he feels immense pressure to make it work, since she's everything he asked for and he's the one who proposed. He'd be breaking more than Whitney's heart if he broke off the engagement. Maybe a part of him is hoping she'll do it if he keeps being distant. JMO.

mindless wrote:I sometimes wonder if he's trying to push her away. I'm sure he feels immense pressure to make it work, since she's everything he asked for and he's the one who proposed. He'd be breaking more than Whitney's heart if he broke off the engagement. Maybe a part of him is hoping she'll do it if he keeps being distant. JMO.

You might be right and that is pathetic on his part. Sadly, I had actually thought maybe after being gone for a couple of weeks I would come back and read that they were seeming to do better instead it seems like it is not progressing at all. Too bad if he feels he can't end it and she is too stubborn to end it.

I would be really ticked off if the man I moved across the country for told the world that he was putting our relationship stuff on hold. I would kick his butt and get my butt back to Chicago.

chasingpavements wrote:I've always felt that Chris really respects and admires Whitney (when asked by the paparazzi why he picked Whitney: "she has her poop together and you can't say that about a lot of people"), and he felt like she was the right type of woman to pick because she wanted all the things that he did and she wouldn't hurt him like his ex-fiance did. But, at the end of the day, it doesn't matter if you share the same values if that true love isn't there. I honestly do think that they are both really genuine, good people so I hope that it does work out for them, but I just don't think it will.

When you first start dating someone or fall for someone at first sight, what you experience isn’t love; as much as you feel like you’re head over heels in love, you really aren’t - you’re just experiencing the first stage of love, a small part in the stages of love known as the infatuation stage. No matter how strong that infatuation might feel, if you don't want the same things out of life and you aren't ready or willing to make a commitment that the relationship will last then it's not going to last. That's why so many showmances don't last - they are only based on infatuation.

The things you describe about Whitney wanting the same things that Chris wanted and wouldn't hurt him like his ex-fiancee did speak to commitment and are the beginnings of true love as opposed to infatuation.

stuckinsc wrote:

mindless wrote:I sometimes wonder if he's trying to push her away. I'm sure he feels immense pressure to make it work, since she's everything he asked for and he's the one who proposed. He'd be breaking more than Whitney's heart if he broke off the engagement. Maybe a part of him is hoping she'll do it if he keeps being distant. JMO.

You might be right and that is pathetic on his part.  Sadly, I had actually thought maybe after being gone for a couple of weeks I would come back and read that they were seeming to do better instead it seems like it is not progressing at all.  Too bad if he feels he can't end it and she is too stubborn to end it.  

I would be really ticked off if the man I moved across the country for told the world that he was putting our relationship stuff on hold.  I would kick his butt and get my butt back to Chicago.

Unfortunately, when it comes to Whitney, I think feeling insecure in the relationship will just make her be even more supportive to show she's there for Chris no matter what. It's a great quality, being able to be so supportive, but I hope he does something for her in return.

Oh goodness…for me all he meant (and we all know he is not the best at expressing his emotions) is that he is ridiculously busy with DWTS and is exhausted emotionally, physically and mentally.   With the amount of money they are paying him I would expect him to be used by ABC to the max.   At the end of the day - regardless of how much he loves Whiteney, wants to spend time with her, he is spent.  That's the cost of being on DWTS and making the money they pay you.

They both knew it going into it and obviously are fine with it. The true test will be when this is over and done and they are back to Iowa/Chicago making their relationship work in real time

JMHO

^^^ That is not how it came across..... imo.  Why not just say he is tired?  Why put your "relationship" on hold?  Very weird to me.  Respect your opinion but happy I can express mine even if it is not very favorable towards Chris.

Couples should be there through thick and thin. Not, "hold on honey, I'll get back to you in a month." JMO by the way.

soccermom333 wrote:^^^ I agree.  I also don't like how he said they are taking a break on the "relationship stuff."  When you truly love someone, you are there for them.  Through thick and thin, ups and downs. etc.     Not surprising to me at all that Chris is acting like this.  Again weird.  JMHO  ;)

When did he say that? I would have to agree that does not sound good at all if true.

I am more of a Whitney fan than Chris fan - although I like him too. I think he doesn't always think before he opens his mouth. Having said that…I truly think there is NO WAY Whitney would stay with him if he wasn't totally into the relationship, and he was in love with her. I know her edit showed her as this strong women who needed a woman/mom to complete her life. While I think that may be her ultimate goal, I don't think she needs any man to completely her life. I think she wants that. Difference.

I just don't see her staying with Chris if he isn't totally in love with her. She is too strong a woman for that.

eliza3 wrote:Oh goodness…for me all he meant (and we all know he is not the best at expressing his emotions) is that he is ridiculously busy with DWTS and is exhausted emotionally, physically and mentally.   With the amount of money they are paying him I would expect him to be used by ABC to the max.   At the end of the day - regardless of how much he loves Whiteney, wants to spend time with her, he is spent.  That's the cost of being on DWTS and making the money they pay you.

They both knew it going into it and obviously are fine with it.   The true test will be when this is over and done and they are back to Iowa/Chicago making their relationship work in real time

JMHO

Absolutely, many people understand this.  There are seasons of our lives that our loved ones take a back seat while we are working or doing a special project or studying.. etc.. They are no different.  This makes perfect sense to me and wise of him and Whitney to both understand this.  If they never make time for each other that is a problem... but DTWS is just for a few months.. and even if he is a rich farmer, cash is always nice.  Many of his assets will be tied up in land and equipment.  I know a lot of people in the farming industry.  This DTWS money is a nice nest egg for them to start their life together.   Maybe do some home remodeling projects

Eviebloom wrote:

eliza3 wrote:Oh goodness…for me all he meant (and we all know he is not the best at expressing his emotions) is that he is ridiculously busy with DWTS and is exhausted emotionally, physically and mentally.   With the amount of money they are paying him I would expect him to be used by ABC to the max.   At the end of the day - regardless of how much he loves Whiteney, wants to spend time with her, he is spent.  That's the cost of being on DWTS and making the money they pay you.

They both knew it going into it and obviously are fine with it.   The true test will be when this is over and done and they are back to Iowa/Chicago making their relationship work in real time

JMHO

Absolutely, many people understand this.  There are seasons of our lives that our loved ones take a back seat while we are working or doing a special project or studying.. etc.. They are no different.  This makes perfect sense to me and wise of him and Whitney to both understand this.  If they never make time for each other that is a problem... but DTWS is just for a few months.. and even if he is a rich farmer, cash is always nice.  Many of his assets will be tied up in land and equipment.  I know a lot of people in the farming industry.  This DTWS money is a nice nest egg for them to start their life together.   Maybe do some home remodeling projects

ITA, plus while he may have money, this will be the first money that they have a couple have earned….there is a difference between the money that comes into a relationship and the money you accumulate together ;)