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Post by Sprite Mon Jan 23, 2017 12:58 pm

@notarose Love your "tango in synchronicity" analogy. That just brought to my mind seeing these two actually doing a tango. :fanningfan


You could be the juiciest, most ripe peach, but there is still going to be someone who doesn't like peaches.
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Post by ukglasgowkiiss Mon Jan 23, 2017 1:58 pm

notarose wrote:^^^
One of things Nick erred in in his ability to perceive in previous Bette seasons was how both Andi and Kaitlyn would react when in situations of conflict. What happens when a woman is at a raw point. After the fact, both showed their tendency to be flippant and bitter toward him within a short period of time post-show. Nick has always said he is confident, after the fact, that not being in a relationship with either is a good thing however at the time Andi or Kaitlyn's conflict resolution style were unknown to him during each Bette season.
Corrine is obviously a magnet for controversy because of her overt behaviour.  First IMO he needs to see how Vanessa approaches him on the matter of Corrine and later he needs to know if she actually does harbor negative feelings over time that will pop up like Lauren and her issue with Ben over his 2 ILYs. I think Nick is trying to find out what he needs to know over the course of filming to minimize any surprises after filming. By allowing potential sources of conflict during filming he could be seen as proactive in gaining valuable knowledge.
Personally I think he would be screwing it up if he didn't validate her (he does plenty of verbal and nonverbal validation), if he didn't hear her (notice how chatty Nick lets Vanessa do lots of talking and reiterates what she has said), if he picked on small stuff (Corrine straddled him, not the reverse, but he just shrugged and said "that's fair" instead of his constant insistence the dolphin was a shark because generally Nick sticks with his truths but with Vanessa he let this tiny inaccuracy go) - and he actually kissed her after she vomitted when he asked Dani if her fingers were clean in her limo exit greeting and there are others things that point to him being a bit of a neat freak.  These are just some examples of how he wants to bend to keep her.
Corrine wants to put on a show and he knows it.  Because of that, he isn't really using Corrine as a person.  He is allowing her to be ridiculous and he is capitalizing on that. Corrine is more an opportunity to help bring conflict to the surface that then allows for issues to be discussed.  Vanessa gets to guestion Nick rather than question their relationship with each other. Nick gets to share more about himself (how he reacts when confronted, how able is he to work toward a mutual solution) and learn more about what Vanessa values in a relationship and how she presents when she is upset.  In the pool confrontation, for example, she leaves no doubt that she is looking for a husband.
If they were to marry there would be many issues that require teamwork. He has always said he is looking for a partner.  Partners need to align in their communication in both good and bad times.  His approach is unorthodox but I approve.  Maybe because I'm a little left of center myself no idea  
Love them as individuals.  Love them together.  Blown away, in fact.  They need to tango in synchronicity in order for this to work for them. If they don't get together I don't feel either screwed it up because it looks like they will leave no stone unturned in their quest to find out if each is their missing piece.  That commitment to finding out is the only way to have no regrets regardless of the final answer.
Not all love stories have happy ending...but this one is stronger than ever from the get go and Vanessa is like no other, so on a visceral level I am floating content.
JMO

Love yr anaysis notarose. ITA that it is a really useful way of testing the others values and committment by this Corrine issue coming up. Reading your precise description of it as allowing thise issues to be discussed makes sense and I suddenly thought - wait a minute I have never seen Nick being fought over before or called out for being flirtatious with more than one. Ironic since he is imo media portrayed as this lothario interested in sex on one hand but then this romantic loser in love on the other- not that i subscribed to either of those views. in his 2 seasons he was the chaser of one lady each time and we are used to seeing him being in that role and the rejected one. But here he is for the first time seen dating muliple women.
I also totally agree about yr description on him letting  Vanessa have that discrepancy - as you are correct Corrine straddled him ' like a piece of meat' as V said in the ep.imo It suited her intention more to say why did you ride C?in the confrontation - as it also allowed her to fully question Nick's intentions.
Floating Content too Norarose- they totally rule together!!! Bring on the rainbows, sunsets and passionate Italians.


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Post by BachIsMyGuiltyPleasure Mon Jan 23, 2017 2:15 pm

@notarose.... Yes!! ..... "nailed it!"  clapping! clapping!

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Post by Maddy Mon Jan 23, 2017 5:45 pm

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priyankachopra
Just give me the rose already @NickViall! #TheBachelor passes on the baton to #Quantico! Now on Mondays at 10|9c
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Post by notarose Mon Jan 23, 2017 6:27 pm

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https://www.instagram.com/p/BPnwfOmABDX/


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Post by AllAboutLove Mon Jan 23, 2017 8:14 pm

notarose wrote:^^^
One of things Nick erred in in his ability to perceive in previous Bette seasons was how both Andi and Kaitlyn would react when in situations of conflict. What happens when a woman is at a raw point. After the fact, both showed their tendency to be flippant and bitter toward him within a short period of time post-show. Nick has always said he is confident, after the fact, that not being in a relationship with either is a good thing however at the time Andi or Kaitlyn's conflict resolution style were unknown to him during each Bette season.
Corrine is obviously a magnet for controversy because of her overt behaviour.  First IMO he needs to see how Vanessa approaches him on the matter of Corrine and later he needs to know if she actually does harbor negative feelings over time that will pop up like Lauren and her issue with Ben over his 2 ILYs. I think Nick is trying to find out what he needs to know over the course of filming to minimize any surprises after filming. By allowing potential sources of conflict during filming he could be seen as proactive in gaining valuable knowledge.
Personally I think he would be screwing it up if he didn't validate her (he does plenty of verbal and nonverbal validation), if he didn't hear her (notice how chatty Nick lets Vanessa do lots of talking and reiterates what she has said), if he picked on small stuff (Corrine straddled him, not the reverse, but he just shrugged and said "that's fair" instead of his constant insistence the dolphin was a shark because generally Nick sticks with his truths but with Vanessa he let this tiny inaccuracy go) - and he actually kissed her after she vomitted when he asked Dani if her fingers were clean in her limo exit greeting and there are others things that point to him being a bit of a neat freak.  These are just some examples of how he wants to bend to keep her.
Corrine wants to put on a show and he knows it.  Because of that, he isn't really using Corrine as a person.  He is allowing her to be ridiculous and he is capitalizing on that. Corrine is more an opportunity to help bring conflict to the surface that then allows for issues to be discussed.  Vanessa gets to guestion Nick rather than question their relationship with each other. Nick gets to share more about himself (how he reacts when confronted, how able is he to work toward a mutual solution) and learn more about what Vanessa values in a relationship and how she presents when she is upset.  In the pool confrontation, for example, she leaves no doubt that she is looking for a husband.
If they were to marry there would be many issues that require teamwork. He has always said he is looking for a partner.  Partners need to align in their communication in both good and bad times.  His approach is unorthodox but I approve.  Maybe because I'm a little left of center myself no idea  
Love them as individuals.  Love them together.  Blown away, in fact.  They need to tango in synchronicity in order for this to work for them. If they don't get together I don't feel either screwed it up because it looks like they will leave no stone unturned in their quest to find out if each is their missing piece.  That commitment to finding out is the only way to have no regrets regardless of the final answer.
Not all love stories have happy ending...but this one is stronger than ever from the get go and Vanessa is like no other, so on a visceral level I am floating content.
JMO

Great post! ITA that Nick's approach is to see how the women and especially the one he chooses handles conflict. Nick himself stated as such in his People recap that he can find out more by not giving someone a rose or by giving it to someone like Corinne, and so far that strategy has worked and has allowed him to see where the women stand and who they are and how they approach him and conflict.

Like Nick said in his blog/recap, conflict and communication of such is part of a real relationship and Nick has already made it clear that he is aware how abnormal this show is and how he doesn't fully trust his feelings on this show because he got it wrong in the past (he said this to Vanessa the evening portion on his date). So to me, I see Nick trying to rely on logic and trying to get real life issues manifest themselves on the show so he can use his head and see the full picture as much as possible rather than just being in a bubble and seeing with emotion.

It's why Nick has been the first Bachelor to state more than once to the women that this is a very abnormal way to go about finding the one and why he has said he wants to empower them to question him and that it's a two-way street. IMO, that is because Nick is trying to make this abnormal and crazy show as real to real relationships and real life as possible.

It's also why I even see how he acts with the women in front of the other women as more real than ever... when Vanessa for example sees how he is with the other women it not only allows for dialogue and discussion between Nick and her, but it also allows her to not be surprised by anything in the future that will play out on TV.

Case in point: Nick being physical with a woman in front of the others IMO is actually him being MORE transparent and preempting any surprises since Vanessa won't be surprised as much by what she sees on TV because she saw it firsthand and they dealt with it while on the show. No doubt it's definitely uncomfortable and one could argue that Nick should not act this way with the other women seeing it but I personally think it's better for them to confront the abnormality of the premise of this show while on the show and not wait for surprises to see what a lead did behind their backs (which I imagine only opens up for some real life conflict and communication for the couple when watching so adding new past issues after the show is filmed).

It plays into Nick's motivation to be transparent, even if it is uncomfortable and unpleasant at times, the thing is it is far far more real, IMO, to see firsthand what it means to be one of many women and deal with it during the show and work through it then rather than to be surprised by watching it play out on TV... because one thing is for sure, it's going to be seen by Nick's F1, sooner or later. :yes: Nick decided to just make it sooner, IMO, and for that reason, I agree with James Gunn that Nick is the smartest bachelor ever.

JMO
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Post by notarose Mon Jan 23, 2017 8:27 pm

@allaboutlove We're on the same wavelength :yes: Transparency is definitely at play.
And the way Nick and Vanessa were able to adapt quickly to each others' body language gives them an additional means to communicate within the bubble.


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Post by Maddy Mon Jan 23, 2017 8:56 pm

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Post by Maddy Tue Jan 24, 2017 3:35 am

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Post by Maddy Tue Jan 24, 2017 3:43 am

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