Bachelor In Paradise - Season 3 - All Episodes - Discussions - *Sleuthing - Spoilers* #2

I agree with most of the comments above. I am a fan of both Caila and Ashley I. I like everything about Caila as a person but I think her personality is not for reality tv. As much as I like her I would not have enjoyed her as a bachelorette. I found Ashley I entertaining on Chris Soules' season and I like how self-aware she was after the show but I got tired of the crying.

Ashley I had the right to feel the way she felt during that time in paradise. IMO it was selfish of Ashley I to ask Caila not to go because Jared will for sure be interested in her. It was wrong for Caila to promise that she won't go to paradise and won't entertain Jared (although she said she was dating someone else when Ashley asked her that). Caila admitted on the podcast that she should have called Ashley before going. Immature as it is, I believe Ashley I does not see anything wrong with what she did. If Jared wants a relationship, he has to stop seeing Ashley even as a friend.

What bothers me is that this all happened in June, why is Ashley still harboring ill feelings toward Caila? Why are most of the castmates and other bachelor alumni ganging up on Caila? AND WHY ISN'T JARED DOING ANYTHING?!

I just can't see AshleyI's pov at all. IMO she's simply a manipulative and entitled mean girl when she doesn't get her way. It's really low and manipulative to go to someone you've just met and tell them not to meet with and get to know a guy, because you like them. And ask them not to go to BIP, because the guy is there. AshleyI simply has no right to do that. She clearly still has feelings for Jared, but most likely is lying to him about them. She should herself cut the friendship with Jared if she can't handle him dating other women.

During Ben's season AshleyI appeared on afterbuzz once, and insinuated that Jared had made her cry a few days prior. I have a feeling that's when he broke things off with her in any romantic way.
IMO just because Caila feels bad/guilty how things panned out, it doesn't make any of her actions wrong, or that she owes anyone apologies. Jmo.

Fingersandtoes wrote:I just can't see AshleyI's pov at all. IMO she's simply a manipulative and entitled mean girl when she doesn't get her way. It's really low and manipulative to go to someone you've just met and tell them not to meet with and get to know a guy, because you like them. And ask them not to go to BIP, because the guy is there. AshleyI simply has no right to do that. She clearly still has feelings for Jared, but most likely is lying to him about them. She should herself cut the friendship with Jared if she can't handle him dating other women.  

During Ben's season AshleyI appeared on afterbuzz once, and insinuated that Jared had made her cry a few days prior. I have a feeling that's when he broke things off with her in any romantic way.  
IMO just because Caila feels bad/guilty how things panned out, it doesn't make any of her actions wrong, or that she owes anyone apologies. Jmo.

Interesting. I remember watching this afterbuzz episode. It was also around this time, maybe a few weeks earlier, that Ashley suddenly decided that she likes Caila and befriended her. I remember seeing her earlier Cosmo recap and she didn't like Caila at all. So the theory that she befriended Caila just so she won't go after Jared might be true.

There isn't anything I like about Ashley. If manipulating people, and controlling others to your benefit is acceptable then IMO there is something seriously wrong with our society. She has a lot of fans, so therefore they, society, must agree with her behaviour which includes liking negative tweets about Caila.

No one that I can see on SM has explained why it was ok for Emily to have such strong feelings about Jared and go on a date with him, but that was ok. What if Caila didn't arrive and Jared was interested in Emily. Would that be ok because Emily is part of Ashley's clique? I have no doubt that Emily would no longer be a friend.

IMO Ashley's friends are those that want to be part of her circle. Their opinions are based on what Ashley likes and doesn't like. When Ashley told Caila not to go on BIP, Caila was seeing someone, of course her response would be, she won't be going. Is she suppose to call her and let her know plans have changed? That's ludicrous that she needs to cater to someone who doesn't even like her to begin with.

Caila IMO is very considerate of other's feelings. She IMO doesn't say what others what to hear, or is concerned what others may think of her, she IMO takes the time to think about what she's going to say in order to not hurt the person she's talking to. She was way to sweet to Ashley when she arrived. I would have told her to stuff it. I can do and go where ever I want, and I don't need to get your authorization for anything.

I just watched the After show and read through comments.  Am I the only one who likes Michelle Collins?  I think she's very smart and very funny, though perhaps she came off better last year as a guest.  She does keep the show moving right along and it's not like it was so great last year with Chris hosting, tthough I do prefer him as host.  And somehow they always manage to find "celebrity" super fans whom I've never heard of but who genuinely make me laugh.

Meanwhile, Michelle must have gotten the memo that Sean is her co-host rather than the guy she doesn't want to sit next to on the subway.    She made more of an effort to include him but he has so little to offer.  He can answer questions but brings no wit nor originality to the program and was upstaged by everyone else, IMO.  How he got this gig is beyond me.

Oh I am so Team Caila. I was just trying to be objective and rationalizing the Ashley situation because it seems so absurd IMO. She has the right to cry if that's how she feels like doing. People express emotions differently. But calling Caila a whore of a friend is IMO just inexcusable. And holding a grudge this long for something so petty is immature.

You guys are right, she didn't have to call her knowing they aren't that close. We also don't know if that would have made a difference. Ashley might still attack Caila otherwise.

I am dreading the coming week because I don't know how they'll portray Caila. I'm not worried about what Caila will say because she seems to be the type who is respectful when she speaks. The thought of ITMs against her (and castmates live tweets) is what I'm afraid of. I hope she surrounds herself with friends for the next couple of weeks.

I think Caila is this year's Sammi Steffen with how the castmates excommunicated her. Although those two are in no way similar IMO.

It is so clear to me that Ashley I learned of Jared's interest in Caila, and then set about to make sure that connection never happened. I find nothing entertaining about such machinations and I am surprised that it's Caila who is being labeled fake or duplicitous. AshleyI befriended the girl she considered her only competition for Jared. This is exactly how she described Caila to Nick. When Ashley's plan didn't work she then made sure that Caila's time on BIP was as difficult as possible, with a final confrontation from Ashley leading Caila to leave. Instead of learning from that, Ashley has used social media and her bach clique to further hurt Caila. Those aren't actions I think should be minimized or excused. I am saddened that so many people have sided with the very person who IMO designed and inflicted the most harm. Why should Caila and Jared not have had the opportunity to meet and connect if that was their choice? Why should they cater to the needs of Ashley, someone who hasn't thought twice about manipulating people purely for her own benefit?

Now a lot has been said about who is real and who is fake. Emily spent a good amount of time bashing Caila behind her back, and has been rewarded by people calling Caila the fake one. I'm still wondering where the "girl code" was when Emily called Caila uglier than her and insulted her character? Did Emily have the "realness" to say that to Caila's face?

IMO the more outlandish characters on reality tv are often people who have made reality television their entire life and career. They don't have to think about professional repercussions because for them drama is the name of the game. I can agree that for those who enjoy that game someone like Caila isn't best suited to play it. But I also know that there are people who enjoy something different. It seems I am sometimes drawn to the people other's deem "boring", but I don't find them boring at all, nor do I think they're being fake. IMO they're often simply people who are more composed and aware of their actions. They realize what they say has consequences and they try not to hurt people. Characteristics I consider positives in any setting.

It can be fun perhaps to watch the over the top dramatic person doing their thing, but I don't think they're being any more "real" than anyone else. I object to the idea that people who are more considered in their approach are not as genuine as the outlandish characters. Being composed and considerate isn't mutually exclusive to being authentic and real. Being thoughtful IMO will never be a negative, on-screen or off. All JMO.

I'm still waiting for people from the franchise to call Ashley I out. Bachelor alumni I was expecting to defend Caila are keeping quiet -- girls who were with her on last weekend's photoshoot and those she was with on July 4th.

EliseAlways wrote:I'm still waiting for people from the franchise to call Ashley I out. Bachelor alumni I was expecting to defend Caila are keeping quiet -- girls who were with her on last weekend's photoshoot and those she was with on July 4th.

I am hoping they are saving it for next week and I hope the public reaction on SM is loud and clear.

I think a lot of bachelor people are thinking that Ashley just seems crazy. Sean Lowe on After Paradise seemed to think it was ridiculous she was still crying over him. But then of course Ashley justified it saying "he led me on". He was like ok but still you have to get over it. But, as for defending Caila, I am not sure it will happen. Just like Sharleen in her blog, Bachelor people seem to be leaving Caila out of the equation I guess.

I'm not really following all the spoiler info of what's to come next on BIP or any SM, but....  

Could the backlash against Caila be more about her breaking Jared's heart? 

Jared seemed very interested in Caila and enjoyed his date with her. Jared chose Caila over Emily and Ashley, so I can see Emily and Ashley feeling upset (even though I don't think Caila and Jared's date was anything 'wrong' and I think Ashley is a whackadoo). But, it almost seems like they and others would be more upset with Caila if they felt she led Jared on or broke his heart. In the previews it shows Caila being confused about her feelings and going out on a date with a new comer. I'm sure Jared was saddened by this turn of events. I'm also certain that the scorned women and Jared-lovers at the resort would choose to be on Jared's side (because that is what immature people tend to do---draw a line in the sand and choose sides. Somebody is the good guy and somebody is the bad guy. I think they make Caila the bad guy.) Just some thoughts....I really haven't got a clue what's about to happen on the show or IRL.

One more comment: Jared seems like a nice guy, but I absolutely do not understand the big draw of him. He just does nothing for me.  Nada, zero, zilch. Kind of like watching paint dry. ZZZzzzz. Maybe Caila felt the same way, and she decided to walk.  

EliseAlways wrote:I'm still waiting for people from the franchise to call Ashley I out. Bachelor alumni I was expecting to defend Caila are keeping quiet -- girls who were with her on last weekend's photoshoot and those she was with on July 4th.

I get the impression those girls don't like Caila and never really did imo. Just based on things they've said in the past, etc.