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Post by Nativenewyorker Fri Jul 19, 2013 2:19 am

Buckeye_Fan wrote:What?  You don't think Chris getting his nasal cavities cleared out was the pivotal moment?  :Smiley: 

I agree, it must have something to do with the visit with Brooks' family.  Des was asking if he was ready to settle down, and she was told yes, to the right girl.  I'd take that as a warning if he wasn't responding like the other guys.  However, maybe the speed at which Brooks is responding is more natural.  Who knows.

I just keep on having suspicions about Drew.  The first spoiler we got was that he was F1.  Then he was F4, then F3, and now he appears to be at least F2.  The horse who is coming up from behind.  To take it all?  Why do we never hear Des say anything about Drew when she's telling Chris H she loves Brooks, but she also feels a lot for Chris.  Could she also be saying something very positive about Drew, but they don't want us to hear about that?  I'm guessing every season the lead is telling Chris who they have fallen for, or at least who they like best.  But we don't get to see that.  They want us to know Des is head-over-heels for Brooks.  Why?  Because he leaves and returns, pledging his undying love?  Or because he leaves, and she realizes that she's better off with a wonderful guy who is crazy about her and won't leave her?

I love this post because you ask some excellent questions. For me the dilemma with Des and Drew is that her words do not match up with her actions. This is really the crux of the issue for me.  We have seen Des looking up adoringly at Drew's face and unable to take her eyes off him. We have seen her grab onto him and not let go. We have seen them with their fingers intertwined, which would be a sign of some intimacy, comfort level and affection.  She enjoys kissing him, for sure!  :Smiley: 

I think this is a real warning sign. Now a few reasons for this dissonance come to mind. First, since we know how edited and scripted this show has always been, is that they could have edited out comments from Des about Drew that would be more revealing and indicative of maybe falling for him. Second, it could be that Des is just infatuated with Drew. It's flattering to her ego to have this gorgeous guy romancing her and giving her all this attention. She may see him as a guy who is too hot for her or who would normally be out of her league. So it's a surface thing with her but not about love.  Third, it could be that Drew has been hidden so that we would see Brooks as the only frontrunner and hear it from Des herself.  Maybe he really is coming on strong.  

As nd said, CH did describe the HTD's as pivotal. That word has significant meaning. Taking this one word and seeing Drew's HTD, one would think that this is where he comes on strong and the hunk that also has a heart of gold and is always there for Des.

That's my two cents for now!   :gotcha:   scratch   hmmm


Last edited by Nativenewyorker on Fri Jul 19, 2013 2:45 am; edited 1 time in total
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Post by Guest Fri Jul 19, 2013 2:27 am

Nativenewyorker wrote:
Buckeye_Fan wrote:What?  You don't think Chris getting his nasal cavities cleared out was the pivotal moment?  :Smiley: 

I agree, it must have something to do with the visit with Brooks' family.  Des was asking if he was ready to settle down, and she was told yes, to the right girl.  I'd take that as a warning if he wasn't responding like the other guys.  However, maybe the speed at which Brooks is responding is more natural.  Who knows.

I just keep on having suspicions about Drew.  The first spoiler we got was that he was F1.  Then he was F4, then F3, and now he appears to be at least F2.  The horse who is coming up from behind.  To take it all?  Why do we never hear Des say anything about Drew when she's telling Chris H she loves Brooks, but she also feels a lot for Chris.  Could she also be saying something very positive about Drew, but they don't want us to hear about that?  I'm guessing every season the lead is telling Chris who they have fallen for, or at least who they like best.  But we don't get to see that.  They want us to know Des is head-over-heels for Brooks.  Why?  Because he leaves and returns, pledging his undying love?  Or because he leaves, and she realizes that she's better off with a wonderful guy who is crazy about her and won't leave her?

I love this post because you ask some excellent questions. For me the dilemma with Des and Drew is that her words do not match up with her actions. This is really the crux of the issue for me.  We have seen Des looking up adoringly at Drew's face and unable to take her eyes off him. We have seen her grab onto him and not let go. We have seen them with their fingers intertwined, which would be a sign of some intimacy, comfort level and affection.  She enjoys kissing him, for sure!  :Smiley: 

I think this is a real warning sign. Now a few reasons for this dissonance come to mind. First, since we know how edited and scripted this show has always been, is that they could have edited out comments from Des about Drew that would be more revealing and indicative of maybe falling for him. Second, it could be that Des is just infatuated with Drew. It's flattering to her ego to have this gorgeous guy romancing her and giving her all this attention. She may see him as a guy who is too hot for you or who would normally be out of her league. So it's a surface thing with her but not about love.  Third, it could be that Drew has been hidden so that we would see Brooks as the only frontrunner and hear it from Des herself.  Maybe he really is coming on strong.  

As nd said, CH did describe the HTD's a pivotal. That word has significant meaning. Taking this one word and seeing Drew's HTD, one would think that this is where he comes on strong and the hunk that also has a heart of gold and is always there for Des.

That's my two cents for now!   :gotcha:   scratch   hmmm 

That's what I think.

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Post by Love_Me Fri Jul 19, 2013 2:33 am

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Post by Love_Me Fri Jul 19, 2013 2:33 am

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Post by IrishGal Fri Jul 19, 2013 3:06 am

I know a bunch of you are hating on Drew's hair for being so full of product.  Well, I'd much rather see hair like that than the style that was started by Chris L and has been perpetuated every season since including this one, Kasey and Zak W.   Too lazy to actually style their hair so stuff it full of gel and point it straight up in front. I call it the conehead look. kasha, I need some examples!  lol.


Team Kaitlin!  Team Booth!
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Post by julychild Fri Jul 19, 2013 3:20 am

This is a new thread but someone (nd?) started a convo in the last thread about CH saying the HTD's episode was pivotal and led to the final outcome of the season. The question was what made that episode pivotal.

My answer is taken from Des' last blog, it was pivotal because that was when she "100% officially fell in love."

Love_me. might I suggest that we keep(if possible) maybe 3-4 pages from a previous thread when starting a new one? A lot of great conversations get lost in these transitions. Thanks and always grateful for all your efforts at keeping the board sane.

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Post by sfrank Fri Jul 19, 2013 8:16 am

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[ @ ] skdaws Loved meeting these studs tonight! All so nice and (obviously) so handsome. #TheBachelorette @drewkenney1985 @RealZakWaddell
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Post by SueSt Fri Jul 19, 2013 9:19 am

Nativenewyorker wrote: For me the dilemma with Des and Drew is that her words do not match up with her actions. This is really the crux of the issue for me.  We have seen Des looking up adoringly at Drew's face and unable to take her eyes off him. We have seen her grab onto him and not let go. We have seen them with their fingers intertwined, which would be a sign of some intimacy, comfort level and affection.  She enjoys kissing him, for sure!  :Smiley: 

I think this is a real warning sign. Now a few reasons for this dissonance come to mind. First, since we know how edited and scripted this show has always been, is that they could have edited out comments from Des about Drew that would be more revealing and indicative of maybe falling for him. Second, it could be that Des is just infatuated with Drew. It's flattering to her ego to have this gorgeous guy romancing her and giving her all this attention. She may see him as a guy who is too hot for her or who would normally be out of her league. So it's a surface thing with her but not about love.  Third, it could be that Drew has been hidden so that we would see Brooks as the only frontrunner and hear it from Des herself.  Maybe he really is coming on strong.  

As nd said, CH did describe the HTD's as pivotal. That word has significant meaning. Taking this one word and seeing Drew's HTD, one would think that this is where he comes on strong and the hunk that also has a heart of gold and is always there for Des.

That's my two cents for now!   :gotcha:   scratch   hmmm

Great post Native.  I'm inclined to think it's a combination.  I agree that Des is very attracted to Drew ... On the other hand, she's set her sights on Brooks... so she’s not willing to let him go at this point.  

Drew's HTD was so terrific and it was obvious to me that it made a really really positive impression on Des.  I found Drew's love declaration swoon-worthy... because he is feeling overwhelmed… for it to just come pouring out of him in such a way was sooo sweet and vulnerable, it literally made me catch my breath.   And physically Des' reaction was to shake her head yes and pull him in for a kiss…. So she’s definitely feeling it too.

My take on Des’ lack of verbal confirmation is that possibly the thought of Drew is a bit overwhelming to Des… I mean he’s got it all, doesn’t he, good looks, good energy, good family AND he is willing to put it all out there that he loves her and wants her in his life.  I mean that’s overwhelming, right?  :-)   And from my experience, falling in love requires a willingness to experience a loss of control; that you are literally falling and depending on the other person to be there for you.  

So maybe in combination with an edit that’s trying to hide things, Des’s words/feelings haven’t yet caught up with what she’s experiencing… like it’s taking a little time for her spirit to catch up with her body… and she’s scared!   A feeling of  - yes, I felt it, but is that what I want?  So, she’s ‘retreating’ into her comfort zone… turning to the arms of a guy that she has to ‘chase’– the unattainable, the unavailable, which is certainly safer than what Drew’s offering…

It will be so interesting to see how this plays out… from my perspective, the question at this point in the show is…  can Des open herself up to the loving man, Drew, or will she continue to chase the unavailable, Brooks…
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Post by Longhornfan Fri Jul 19, 2013 11:05 am

SueSt wrote:
Nativenewyorker wrote: For me the dilemma with Des and Drew is that her words do not match up with her actions. This is really the crux of the issue for me.  We have seen Des looking up adoringly at Drew's face and unable to take her eyes off him. We have seen her grab onto him and not let go. We have seen them with their fingers intertwined, which would be a sign of some intimacy, comfort level and affection.  She enjoys kissing him, for sure!  :Smiley: 

I think this is a real warning sign. Now a few reasons for this dissonance come to mind. First, since we know how edited and scripted this show has always been, is that they could have edited out comments from Des about Drew that would be more revealing and indicative of maybe falling for him. Second, it could be that Des is just infatuated with Drew. It's flattering to her ego to have this gorgeous guy romancing her and giving her all this attention. She may see him as a guy who is too hot for her or who would normally be out of her league. So it's a surface thing with her but not about love.  Third, it could be that Drew has been hidden so that we would see Brooks as the only frontrunner and hear it from Des herself.  Maybe he really is coming on strong.  

As nd said, CH did describe the HTD's as pivotal. That word has significant meaning. Taking this one word and seeing Drew's HTD, one would think that this is where he comes on strong and the hunk that also has a heart of gold and is always there for Des.

That's my two cents for now!   :gotcha:   scratch   hmmm

Great post Native.  I'm inclined to think it's a combination.  I agree that Des is very attracted to Drew ... On the other hand, she's set her sights on Brooks... so she’s not willing to let him go at this point.  

Drew's HTD was so terrific and it was obvious to me that it made a really really positive impression on Des.  I found Drew's love declaration swoon-worthy... because he is feeling overwhelmed… for it to just come pouring out of him in such a way was sooo sweet and vulnerable, it literally made me catch my breath.   And physically Des' reaction was to shake her head yes and pull him in for a kiss…. So she’s definitely feeling it too.

My take on Des’ lack of verbal confirmation is that the thought of Drew is a bit overwhelming to Des… I mean he’s got it all, doesn’t he, good looks, good energy, good family AND he is willing to put it all out there that he loves her and wants her in his life.  I mean that’s overwhelming, right?  :-)   And from my experience, falling in love requires a willingness to experience a loss of control; that you are literally falling and depending on the other person to be there for you.  

So maybe in combination with an edit that’s trying to hide things, Des’s words/feelings haven’t yet caught up with what she’s experiencing… like it’s taking a little time for her spirit to catch up with her body… and she’s scared!   A feeling of  - yes, I felt it, but is that what I want?  So, she’s ‘retreating’ into her comfort zone… turning to the arms of a guy that she has to ‘chase’– the unattainable, the unavailable, which is certainly safer than what Drew’s offering…

It will be so interesting to see how this plays out… from my perspective the question is…  can Des open herself up to the loving man, Drew, or will she continue to chase the unavailable, Brooks…

This is interesting.  Chris H also mentioned something else in his article where he discussed the hometown dates as being very pivotal to the outcome of the finale .  CH said that with all of the other 3 guys openly expressing their love for Des, she continued to "chase" the one who had not completely opened up and expressed his feelings to her.  CH went on to say that "you would think that we would learn, but that that is just a cliche".  I am not sure if that is the exact wording, but he was basically saying that Des seemed to be repeating an old pattern by chasing the one guy who seemed to be unavailable.

So, I absolutely agree with your assessment above.  I have felt all along that Brooks is the kind of guy that Des has always been attracted to.  He is the one guy out of her F4 who she probably feels is unavailble emotionally and fears that perhaps will not love her back as much as she will love him.  Therefore, this could have caused Des to "retreat back into her comfort zone" and choose Brooks, because he does fit the mold.

So, I will not be the least bit surprised if Des does end up choosing Brooks at the very end.  It appears that Drew offered Des his heart on a platter....as did both Chris and Zak as well.  So, I am interested to see if Brooks does leave and come back, since that would seem appropriate to the edit that Brooks has been given.

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Post by SueSt Fri Jul 19, 2013 11:28 am

Longhornfan wrote:
SueSt wrote:
Nativenewyorker wrote: For me the dilemma with Des and Drew is that her words do not match up with her actions. This is really the crux of the issue for me.  We have seen Des looking up adoringly at Drew's face and unable to take her eyes off him. We have seen her grab onto him and not let go. We have seen them with their fingers intertwined, which would be a sign of some intimacy, comfort level and affection.  She enjoys kissing him, for sure!  :Smiley: 

I think this is a real warning sign. Now a few reasons for this dissonance come to mind. First, since we know how edited and scripted this show has always been, is that they could have edited out comments from Des about Drew that would be more revealing and indicative of maybe falling for him. Second, it could be that Des is just infatuated with Drew. It's flattering to her ego to have this gorgeous guy romancing her and giving her all this attention. She may see him as a guy who is too hot for her or who would normally be out of her league. So it's a surface thing with her but not about love.  Third, it could be that Drew has been hidden so that we would see Brooks as the only frontrunner and hear it from Des herself.  Maybe he really is coming on strong.  

As nd said, CH did describe the HTD's as pivotal. That word has significant meaning. Taking this one word and seeing Drew's HTD, one would think that this is where he comes on strong and the hunk that also has a heart of gold and is always there for Des.

That's my two cents for now!   :gotcha:   scratch   hmmm

Great post Native.  I'm inclined to think it's a combination.  I agree that Des is very attracted to Drew ... On the other hand, she's set her sights on Brooks... so she’s not willing to let him go at this point.  

Drew's HTD was so terrific and it was obvious to me that it made a really really positive impression on Des.  I found Drew's love declaration swoon-worthy... because he is feeling overwhelmed… for it to just come pouring out of him in such a way was sooo sweet and vulnerable, it literally made me catch my breath.   And physically Des' reaction was to shake her head yes and pull him in for a kiss…. So she’s definitely feeling it too.

My take on Des’ lack of verbal confirmation is that the thought of Drew is a bit overwhelming to Des… I mean he’s got it all, doesn’t he, good looks, good energy, good family AND he is willing to put it all out there that he loves her and wants her in his life.  I mean that’s overwhelming, right?  :-)   And from my experience, falling in love requires a willingness to experience a loss of control; that you are literally falling and depending on the other person to be there for you.  

So maybe in combination with an edit that’s trying to hide things, Des’s words/feelings haven’t yet caught up with what she’s experiencing… like it’s taking a little time for her spirit to catch up with her body… and she’s scared!   A feeling of  - yes, I felt it, but is that what I want?  So, she’s ‘retreating’ into her comfort zone… turning to the arms of a guy that she has to ‘chase’– the unattainable, the unavailable, which is certainly safer than what Drew’s offering…

It will be so interesting to see how this plays out… from my perspective the question is…  can Des open herself up to the loving man, Drew, or will she continue to chase the unavailable, Brooks…

This is interesting.  Chris H also mentioned something else in his article where he discussed the hometown dates as being very pivotal to the outcome of the finale .  CH said that with all of the other 3 guys openly expressing their love for Des, she continued to "chase" the one who had not completely opened up and expressed his feelings to her.  CH went on to say that "you would think that we would learn, but that that is just a cliche".  I am not sure if that is the exact wording, but he was basically saying that Des seemed to be repeating an old pattern by chasing the one guy who seemed to be unavailable.

So, I absolutely agree with your assessment above.  I have felt all along that Brooks is the kind of guy that Des has always been attracted to.  He is the one guy out of her F4 who she probably feels is unavailble emotionally and fears that perhaps will not love her back as much as she will love him.  Therefore, this could have caused Des to "retreat back into her comfort zone" and choose Brooks, because he does fit the mold.

So, I will not be the least bit surprised if Des does end up choosing Brooks at the very end.  It appears that Drew offered Des his heart on a platter....as did both Chris and Zak as well.  So, I am interested to see if Brooks does leave and come back, since that would seem appropriate to the edit that Brooks has been given.

Thanks Longhorn... Well, per Chris' comments, she'd definitely still stuck on Brooks at this point in the journey... but the outcome/outlook is still murky... so I guess we'll just have to wait and see. :-)Regardless of her choice, it was helpful for me to quantify for myself what's at stake!
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Post by Ariela Fri Jul 19, 2013 11:28 am

Longhornfan wrote:
SueSt wrote:
Nativenewyorker wrote: For me the dilemma with Des and Drew is that her words do not match up with her actions. This is really the crux of the issue for me.  We have seen Des looking up adoringly at Drew's face and unable to take her eyes off him. We have seen her grab onto him and not let go. We have seen them with their fingers intertwined, which would be a sign of some intimacy, comfort level and affection.  She enjoys kissing him, for sure!  :Smiley: 

I think this is a real warning sign. Now a few reasons for this dissonance come to mind. First, since we know how edited and scripted this show has always been, is that they could have edited out comments from Des about Drew that would be more revealing and indicative of maybe falling for him. Second, it could be that Des is just infatuated with Drew. It's flattering to her ego to have this gorgeous guy romancing her and giving her all this attention. She may see him as a guy who is too hot for her or who would normally be out of her league. So it's a surface thing with her but not about love.  Third, it could be that Drew has been hidden so that we would see Brooks as the only frontrunner and hear it from Des herself.  Maybe he really is coming on strong.  

As nd said, CH did describe the HTD's as pivotal. That word has significant meaning. Taking this one word and seeing Drew's HTD, one would think that this is where he comes on strong and the hunk that also has a heart of gold and is always there for Des.

That's my two cents for now!   :gotcha:   scratch   hmmm

Great post Native.  I'm inclined to think it's a combination.  I agree that Des is very attracted to Drew ... On the other hand, she's set her sights on Brooks... so she’s not willing to let him go at this point.  

Drew's HTD was so terrific and it was obvious to me that it made a really really positive impression on Des.  I found Drew's love declaration swoon-worthy... because he is feeling overwhelmed… for it to just come pouring out of him in such a way was sooo sweet and vulnerable, it literally made me catch my breath.   And physically Des' reaction was to shake her head yes and pull him in for a kiss…. So she’s definitely feeling it too.

My take on Des’ lack of verbal confirmation is that the thought of Drew is a bit overwhelming to Des… I mean he’s got it all, doesn’t he, good looks, good energy, good family AND he is willing to put it all out there that he loves her and wants her in his life.  I mean that’s overwhelming, right?  :-)   And from my experience, falling in love requires a willingness to experience a loss of control; that you are literally falling and depending on the other person to be there for you.  

So maybe in combination with an edit that’s trying to hide things, Des’s words/feelings haven’t yet caught up with what she’s experiencing… like it’s taking a little time for her spirit to catch up with her body… and she’s scared!   A feeling of  - yes, I felt it, but is that what I want?  So, she’s ‘retreating’ into her comfort zone… turning to the arms of a guy that she has to ‘chase’– the unattainable, the unavailable, which is certainly safer than what Drew’s offering…

It will be so interesting to see how this plays out… from my perspective the question is…  can Des open herself up to the loving man, Drew, or will she continue to chase the unavailable, Brooks…

This is interesting.  Chris H also mentioned something else in his article where he discussed the hometown dates as being very pivotal to the outcome of the finale .  CH said that with all of the other 3 guys openly expressing their love for Des, she continued to "chase" the one who had not completely opened up and expressed his feelings to her.  CH went on to say that "you would think that we would learn, but that that is just a cliche".  I am not sure if that is the exact wording, but he was basically saying that Des seemed to be repeating an old pattern by chasing the one guy who seemed to be unavailable.

So, I absolutely agree with your assessment above.  I have felt all along that Brooks is the kind of guy that Des has always been attracted to.  He is the one guy out of her F4 who she probably feels is unavailble emotionally and fears that perhaps will not love her back as much as she will love him.  Therefore, this could have caused Des to "retreat back into her comfort zone" and choose Brooks, because he does fit the mold.

So, I will not be the least bit surprised if Des does end up choosing Brooks at the very end.  It appears that Drew offered Des his heart on a platter....as did both Chris and Zak as well.  So, I am interested to see if Brooks does leave and come back, since that would seem appropriate to the edit that Brooks has been given.

ITA.
It will be interesting if she'll learn anything or continue her old pattern. Drew is what she needs. Brooks is what she wants.

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Post by LLiza Fri Jul 19, 2013 11:39 am

When your search for true love continually leaves you empty and disappointed, it is best to analyze, do some self-searching, and then break your habits. Being hurt in relationships eventually becomes an addiction, and you have everything to do with it. I'm not sure, though, that young people have experienced enough to figure that out.

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