Rachael Kirkconnell - Bachelor 25 - Matt James - Discussion - *Sleuthing Spoilers*

@GuardianAngel wrote:

@gabriele wrote:snipped

I do understand where you are coming from GA. While those of us who are white are offended by racism too I’ve seen many POC say it is not our place to accept an apology on their behalf because the racism was directed toward them. I think what happens practically is that white people then determine whether or not an apology to POC is acceptable. From what I read this is happening on Rachael’s IG in that white people are commenting that she “has nothing to apologize for” or are praising her apology. Many POC probably would not agree with those takes by the white commenters. They see their voices getting silenced or ignored whereas the white voices tend to dominate and shape the narrative. Hopefully, I’ve explained that correctly but if not someone who understands this better than I can correct me.

Thank you for the explanation.    I don't read SM comments so I have no idea what's been said. I wasn't accepting or denying her apology, I was just commenting, but that makes total sense.

My point I think is what Ivan Hall described which I'm going to put myself in that category:

Additional thanks to all of the white allies out there (especially @ashleyspivey ). #BachelorNation

https://www.instagram.com/p/CLMrUzzptnY/

To me, as a white person the way I think of it is if a man says something about women that's offensive, and then apologizes for it - and then men come along and accept that apology and tell women it's time to move on. No, it's women who have the right to accept or not accept that apology. This is why as a white person, it's not for me to accept or not accept Rachael's apology.

Lol! I’d block people too, just saying...Why would you want to follow me if you have such disdain for me? I’ll make it easy for both of us. I’m definitely not a fan, but you don’t go into other people’s homes, disrespect them then expect them to still show you hospitality. It is what it is.

@luvnunity wrote:Lol!  I’d block people too, just saying...Why would you want to follow me if you have such disdain for me?  I’ll make it easy for both of us.  I’m definitely not a fan, but you don’t go into other people’s homes, disrespect them then expect them to still show you hospitality. It is what it is.

@albean99 wrote:I think it's because while anyone can be offended or angry at seeing examples of bigotry and racism, many of us are not the ones hurt directly by it. I don't have a problem with Racheal making it clear who her apology was for.

I know that I have a lot to learn and clearly so does Racheal. If she is the f1 then it gets that much harder with the media attention.

Reddit was calling Rachael out for not commenting back to the most likely white people who were granting her instant forgiveness that the apology was for the minority communities she insulted. I’m deeply offended by her racism, but as a white person, it’s not going to be as hurtful as it is to a PoC who has dealt with racism their entire lives & whose ancestors may have been enslaved.

@Emeralds if I were in her shoes, I would respond to that person directly and pin that response. Just 1 person.. Racheal didnt have to make that blanket statement to the non-POC... She needs to avoid any collective statement that can rub anyone the wrong way.. Apply tact and fly under the radar.. 
JMO

@GuardianAngel I'm with you. I want to be considered a white ally and hopefully show my respect appropriately.

@luvnunity wrote:Still processing my feelings about her.  My biggest issue is that I wish we didn't even have to watch this happen on Matt's season.  What this has become is a season of watching a black man constantly tend to toxic issues of white women.  It's not that BIPOC viewers were insisting he end up with a WOC, we just wanted to watch a normal-ish dating scenario like everyone else has had.

This! If I were Matt, I'd be pissed that my race was used in such a way. Think how Tayshia represented - showed respect, all the guys were falling all over her because of WHO she was and HOW she treated the men. Matt has not received that respect - the drama was so disrespectful to him. And now this nastiness. UGH.

@Ruqibabe She definitely should have explained herself much better. I’m almost certain that she’s monitoring Reddit & there was a big discussion there that this apology should be for PoC & that she needed to reply to the white commenters forgiving her telling them so. I think that’s what spurred her second statement. I would have said something more along the lines of my actions were deeply offensive to everyone, but most hurtful to PoC & it’s their apology I hope to one day earn.

@Ruqibabe wrote:@Emeralds if I were in her shoes, I would respond to that person directly and pin that response. Just 1 person.. Racheal didn't have to make that blanket statement to the non-POC... She needs to avoid any collective statement that can rub anyone the wrong way.. Apply tact and fly under the radar.. 
JMO

I don't think that Rachael has the PR skill set to manage this on her own. She issued her initial statement, and I think she needs to let it rest for a while. Trying to guide your followers is a tricky business at best, and at this point in time, I don't think she's up to it.

Reddit is not going to be happy with her no matter what she does. That's the blunt truth. They're going hard after Hannah B. right now after she issued her video statement. This is the same group that shredded Jenna to pieces over what turned out to be a made-up story. That's why I think the less said, the better.

While I generally don’t like Reddit, I read there only for the spoilers, I have to say it is a great place to learn about becoming anti-racist. That is the silver lining of the last Bachelor year between HB and now Rachael.

@gabriele wrote:While I generally don’t like Reddit, I read there only for the spoilers, I have to say it is a great place to learn about becoming anti-racist. That is the silver lining of the last Bachelor year between HB and now Rachael.

I don't watch the show to get "educated" in anti-racism. I watch the show to be entertained. Should Rachael, Hannah, Lee, etc. been called out for their behavior? Sure. Should the show be held accountable for its casting? Absolutely. But the Reddit sub has a history of being nasty and vicious (i.e. Jenna, but there's no shortage of examples.) It's a cesspool. Normally I've held my tongue, but I'm at a loss as to why cast members would give it any further heed. It's like throwing meat to sharks.

At this point, there is literally nothing Rachael or Hannah could do that would make that sub happy. Nothing. So why bother? If I were Rachael K., I would only do the mandatory interviews that are contractually required, and then I would go about my business. Keep in mind, I'm not excusing her behavior. I'm just stating that the battle of public opinion as it concerns that sub is already lost.

And as for a potential interview with Rachel L., why would Rachael K. even try? Rachel has four years of law school, is a trained orator, knows how to parse a response, and how to go after an opponent (or in this case an "opponent.") Rachael K. has already demonstrated that she is in over her head. If I were her, I'd give the podcasts a hard pass. I'm not throwing shade at Rachel L. (who I think could have gone harder on Chris H. in the interview for Extra,) just stating that IMO Rachael K. has literally nothing to gain from an interview with her.

@Amethyst I don’t think anyone needs to try to appease those on the Reddit subs, but rather by reading threads there I inadvertently learned a lot about anti-racism.