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Bachelor In Paradise Australia - Season 2 - Episodes - Sleuthing Spoilers

Dirty Street Pie wrote:Thank you for your superb recapping @Bobette I was only half watching last night as my care factor is very low. Far too much Alexnation and generally sh!tty male behaviour this season

Aside from Alisha's redemption and Flo & Davey's cheesy make out session on the daybed this season has been a total disappointment IMO, but of course we saw that coming so +1 for sleuthing instincts at least!

Ep 12 Preview:

"Is he just going to ghost me?" It's time for a good ol' fashioned GRILLING from the friends and family. 8.40 TONIGHT. #BachelorInParadiseAU pic.twitter.com/HjSckpFKdK
— Bachelor In Paradise Australia (@BachParadiseAU) May 1, 2019

Source

Bachelor In Paradise Australia - Season 2 - Episodes - Sleuthing Spoilers

Elora makes a play for Connor but he wants to see things through with Shannon. Faced with no other option, she goes to talk to Mack. She tells him he's her only chance of receiving a rose. He looks at her like the math teacher when you're trying to explain why you haven't done your homework for the third day in a row.

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It's a no from Mack.

Rose ceremony:

Nathan - Tenille
Jules - Alisha
Bill - Alex
USAlex - Caroline
Davey - Flo
Connor - long pause - dramatic music - commercial break - Shannon.

But there's a twist - he offers her the rose if she'll leave with him. She agrees and they head off to see if she can find a make up artist who can match the colour of her foundation to her neck as well as her face.

This is what Paradise is all about #BachelorInParadiseAU pic.twitter.com/tlGWaN6yhf
— Bachelor In Paradise Australia (@BachParadiseAU) April 30, 2019

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Final rose:

Mack - Zoe.

Elora goes home.

Preview of next episode: FAMILIES! Didn't see that coming. The preview makes it look like Nathan & Tenille will finish together, and Bill and Alex who we already knew about. Ditto USAlex/Caroline. Alisha is shown giving Jules an ultimatum. I presume we're meant to think they split, which probably makes them the surprise/feelgood couple at the end.

I've heard on the grapevine that Flo dumps Davey at the finale so it will be interesting to see if that happens and what reasons are given. Davey's all over the media this week with a new gf so he's apparently not too cut up about it. Makes me think Davey & Flo were brought in late in the game when TPTB realised how few couples they had to work with.

Bachelor In Paradise Australia - Season 2 - Episodes - Sleuthing Spoilers

Shannon and ~~Clark Kent~~ Connor are bickering on the daybed. I'd almost forgotten they're still there. He says she's too closed off. Seems like they're headed for splitsville but I haven't seen enough of them recently to care.

The girls come back from their date. Bill is happy to hear that they didn't kiss. Alex says being with Elora made her miss Bill more and he says the same. He says they're "stronger than ever".

*Eye rolling intensifies*

Elora tries to rustle up a rose. She makes a play for Nathan but he just wants to run back to Tenille. Connor keeps mentioning there's "things in Shannon's past" that she refuses to open up about.

I feel like I should know what he's talking about but I don't (did I miss something?). Shannon says maybe she's not meant to fall in love and looks like an adorable French schoolgirl who's lost her puppy. Awww.

Aw Shannon, we love you #BachelorInParadiseAU pic.twitter.com/Jij8NdUMPJ
— Bachelor In Paradise Australia (@BachParadiseAU) April 30, 2019

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A date card arrives. It goes to Jules and Alisha. They get the best date so far IMO - high tea in the middle of the ocean. Seems to me TPTB realise J & A are their only shot at a happy couple and are throwing everything they've got at them.

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Unfortunately, Jules didn't get the memo. Alisha explains - in a very articulate and endearing manner - how she's feeling. She's still looking for some solid reassurance that Jules is actually into her. He gives her nothing.

Eventually she spells it out for him: "What do YOU think of Alisha and Jules?", she asks. "I think it's weird", he replies, and "I feel like moving forward under an umbrella of ambiguity would be best for us".

Jules certainly has a way with words #BachelorInParadiseAU pic.twitter.com/WfuZxxTBZm
— Bachelor In Paradise Australia (@BachParadiseAU) April 30, 2019

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"I don't think that's going to work for me", says Alisha, and then gives us more of those genuine feels she's been dishing out all season. What an unexpected pleasure it has been watching her on this show.

"We're sort of really good friends that make out a lot"... what does this mean for Alisha & Jules? #BachelorInParadiseAU pic.twitter.com/Upj0LOqjlM
— Bachelor In Paradise Australia (@BachParadiseAU) April 30, 2019

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Bachelor In Paradise Australia - Season 2 - Episodes - Sleuthing Spoilers

Ep 11 and I can see the light at the end of the tunnel. Yay.

Alisha carries Jules across camp to a daybed. I think it's getting to that stage where everyone's going a bit stir crazy.

Couple goals #BachelorInParadiseAU pic.twitter.com/dmS8d9oKyy
— Bachelor In Paradise Australia (@BachParadiseAU) April 30, 2019

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Mack can't understand why he hasn't been getting dates, clearly not realising that being "the guy who doesn't get dates and can't understand why" is the only thing mildly entertaining about his position on the show. Mack is the MOT of paradise.

Elora arrives. She reminisces about that time she and Simone practically fought to the death over Apollo. They show footage of Apollo oiling his nipples and anyone who hasn't watched season 1 immediately rushes to www.bachelorarchive.com to see if it's available to watch for free (good news - it is!

)

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Alexnation's "me me me" alarm sounds loudly and she runs - literally RUNS - to where she knows the camera will be pointed.

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Such a desperado.

Everyone comments on how sexy Elora is and they're not wrong. Elora says she's here to "play the game". Meow.

"This chick just oozes sex" The fiery Elora launches into Paradise #BachelorInParadiseAU pic.twitter.com/dZqHC8Zgu1
— Bachelor In Paradise Australia (@BachParadiseAU) April 30, 2019

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A date card arrives and TPTB get Mack to announce it. He says again how much he wants the date, how he's never had a date, how other people have had multiple dates on this show and he's never had one ever.

The date goes to Elora

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Bachelor In Paradise Australia - Season 2 - Episodes - Sleuthing Spoilers

Back at camp, Cass starts grilling Richie about where they're at. That doesn't seem like a good idea. Richie is concerned about long distance. His wording suggests this holiday romance is drawing to a close.

Tenille and Nathan come back from their date. It's pretty clear where Tenille's rose will be going. Ivan panics. He has to stay to he can stalk Tenille and make her life miserable. He attempts to crack on to Caroline.

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SO AWKWARD.

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"If you have to ask, it's not the moment", replies Caroline. "F*&% OFF" would also have been an acceptable response. Richie takes Cass aside and lets her down gently. Cass gets it. She's sad but understanding. Aww.

Oh Cass #BachelorInParadiseAU pic.twitter.com/mBsuuFoZVT
— Bachelor In Paradise Australia (@BachParadiseAU) April 28, 2019

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Richie leaves. Cass tells the rest of the group. Everyone gathers round to comfort her before Alex-effing-nation takes her aside. Alex pretends to comfort Cass but basically uses it as an excuse to try to make Richie look bad.

Urrrgghhh I can't STAND her! A full transcript of Alex's speech to Cass is provided here for your convenience: "Me, me me mee me me, me ME, me me mee me me. Me, me me me, me me me. Also me."

Rose ceremony

Flo - Davey
Alex - Bill
Alisha - Jules
Shannon - Connor
Tenille - Nathan
Caroline - USAlex
Zoe - Mack

Ivan goes home and everyone breathes a sigh of relief. I'd be concerned for his future girlfriends but I think having this broadcast on national television should ensure he's given a WIDE berth by any sane Australian woman.

Bachelor In Paradise Australia - Season 2 - Episodes - Sleuthing Spoilers

Caroline likes USAlex. He says he feels like they're "getting along too well too soon". Huh? "I'm not a fan of sharing my private life with others", says the man on a reality dating television show.

"I've dated people for months before I kiss them", he says, and now I know he's completely BSing us. Having apparently now set some kind of scene, he kisses her. I think we're meant to be pleased but I feel a resounding "meh".

Mack takes Zoe off for a supposedly-romantic chat. It's awkward AF. "I think there would be a possibility of compatibility between you and I", he says. He lists her good qualities as if she's applying for a job on his Taco van. Meh.

Ivan is still sulking. Bill goes off to have a bro chat with him. Ivan does. not. get. it. Bill asks Tenille to go talk to him. Tenille doesn't want to, because she's a rational human being and Ivan is a scary controlling man child.

You go girl. #BachelorInParadiseAU pic.twitter.com/625nTarpN9
— Bachelor In Paradise Australia (@BachParadiseAU) April 28, 2019

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Next morning, a date card arrives, and it's Tenille. "Anyone but Nathan", asserts Ivan. Tenille cowers. She's SCARED of how Ivan will react. She talks in code with Cass about taking Nathan. Cass practically screams YES GIRL DO IT.

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Source: Tenplay

She does it. Everyone applauds. Nathan's excited. They have fun. It's cute.

Could you get a better looking couple? #BachelorInParadiseAU pic.twitter.com/FfRTSuzF3L
— Bachelor In Paradise Australia (@BachParadiseAU) April 28, 2019

Source

The producers seize the opportunity to get rid of Ivan the Psychopath and announce a rose ceremony. Ivan gets on a paddle board and heads back to AU.

Just Ivan, paddlin' all the way back to Melbourne #BachelorInParadiseAU pic.twitter.com/vYebAudSvq
— Bachelor In Paradise Australia (@BachParadiseAU) April 28, 2019

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Bachelor In Paradise Australia - Season 2 - Episodes - Sleuthing Spoilers

Daniel & Flo return hand in hand. Flo sees Davey and Daniel ceases to exit. She gets all giggly and they hug. It's super cute. There is clearly some off-screen history between these two IMO but I see genuine affection here so not going to be cynical.

The Flo & Davey reunion we've been waiting for #BachelorInParadiseAU pic.twitter.com/nWeOPAi2S6
— Bachelor In Paradise Australia (@BachParadiseAU) April 28, 2019

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Flo launches into a recap of her time so far, while the editors dub over Davey's internal monologue. It's hilarious. "She's so, like... Dutch", he says.

A saxophone plays. Davey kisses her to shut her up and TPTB gives them F1-esque music. It's by far my favourite moment from two seasons of BiP AU.

Kudos producers and editors for going full cheese with this one.

YES YES YES #BachelorInParadiseAU pic.twitter.com/fV7dJTsdsq
— Bachelor In Paradise Australia (@BachParadiseAU) April 28, 2019

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It's pretty clear IMO that these two are, shall we say, familiar with each other from the outside world. Can't see them ever being in a serious relationship but they look very comfortable and I get the impression they have fun when they get together.

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Source: Tenplay

Bachelor In Paradise Australia - Season 2 - Episodes - Sleuthing Spoilers

Idlemess wrote:Thanks for the recap @Bobette

I’m vicariously watching through your eyes and it’s hilarious. Great work! I think the comic relief makes it bearable to watch.,

notarose wrote:
@Bobette I’m all for you getting sponsors for your posts.

Thanks guys glad you're enjoying my ramblings.

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@notarose Think I'll leave sponsored posts to the contestants since I fear it would inhibit my writing style too much.

"Jules stares pensively out to sea, no doubt wondering how many Vanns gigs he's missing out on while on the show. Alisha takes a sip on her delicious Fiji (TM) water and I remember that Woolworths have six packs on special this week for only $12.00..."

Let finale week begin!

Can you believe it? It’s FINALE WEEK and we’ve got all the Paradise goodness we can squeeze in. #BachelorInParadiseAU, 7.30 Sunday and 8.40 Tuesday - Thursday on 10 pic.twitter.com/7qtLBnZFOo
— Bachelor In Paradise Australia (@BachParadiseAU) April 26, 2019

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Bachelor In Paradise Australia - Season 2 - Episodes - Sleuthing Spoilers

Next day, Flo is asking Alisha what happened "while I was napping".

She's such a nanna and I relate to her on yet another level. Next episode I wouldn't be surprised to see her in a rocking chair knitting tea cosies.

Happy with the storyline Daniel's date with Alisha precipitated yesterday, TPTB give him ANOTHER date card. He chooses Flo. She throws off her knee rug and away they go. Ivan says he's dodging bullets like Neo from the Matrix.

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Tenille has had enough. In her characteristically polite, diplomatic manner, she finally dumps Ivan. The producers excitedly gather round to watch him explode, but instead all they get is a 7 foot man sobbing in a hammock.

It's not all sunshine in Paradise. Ivan & Tenille are over. #BachelorInParadiseAU pic.twitter.com/Jkxck5odnh
— Bachelor In Paradise Australia (@BachParadiseAU) April 25, 2019

Source

It's kind of anticlimactic, but at least Tenille is free. As the episode draws to a close, Osher arrives to reveal that Davey is coming back AGAIN, giving the girls the power for a second RC in a row.

The scene is set for Nathan to make a move on Tenille, and Flo and Shannon to get a second (3rd? 4th?) shot at Davey. In the preview for next ep, Cass and Richie are in turmoil. No clue yet as to why...

Bachelor In Paradise Australia - Season 2 - Episodes - Sleuthing Spoilers

Nathan is on his date with Shannon and the crickets are chirping loudly. I'm sure it wasn't quite as awkward as the editors are making it seem, but it's amusing to watch so I'll let it slide.

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Source: Tenplay.

Jules and Tenille return to the group and Ivan immediately reclaims Tenille as his property by smearing a fresh layer of funky Croatian pheromones all over her. I wish I hadn't chosen to eat while I watch.

We can't unsee this. #BachelorInParadiseAU pic.twitter.com/BKXdZErJVG
— Bachelor In Paradise Australia (@BachParadiseAU) April 24, 2019

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Flo is being her usual straight talking sour bitch self and I love it. The "couples" are driving her nuts and she's not interested in any of the men so she decides to sleep the day away instead.

Osher strides in to announce there will be a rose ceremony. Jules realises he's in trouble. Flo is complaining that there's no men there for her. Mack suggests they team up and her face says it all.

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Alisha Beyonce's her way into the ceremony. In an ITM she says "one thing I am sure of is that I am NOT giving my rose to Jules". Even if I hadn't seen the spoilers, I would immediately know that Alisha is 100% giving her rose to Jules.

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Source: Tenplay

Bachelor In Paradise Australia - Season 2 - Episodes - Sleuthing Spoilers

Episode 8:

Cass is obsessively working out because she's sexually frustrated. I'm enjoying Cass this season; she's been level-headed and cute IMO. I have a feeling Richie will tap out and leave as friends but I think Cass has come across well.

Ivan is an controlling nutcase who seems to find it necessary to ask his girlfriend-of-4-days, a grown woman, if she needs to go to the toilet. I would like to request he be added to some kind of watch list please.

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Seriously dude WTF.

Source: Tenplay.

Tenille says she's feeling "a little bit smothered". I don't know if she's considered going into politics but she could be the most diplomatic person in AU right now. Since Tenille won't say it I will: Ivan's being an aggro, possessive creep.

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Source: Tenplay

Flashback to last night of Jules being a pr*ck. Alisha seems to have misplaced her bikini bottoms so is instead wearing a folded serviette held in place by a couple of pieces of dental floss. Brave, Alisha. Very brave.

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Source: Tenplay

Jules is talking about some "weird sparkly connection" he feels with Tenille but I think the only weird sparkles are happening in the vicinity of his underpants. He says he feels like he and Tenille are on the same page.

Cut to Alexnation asking Tenille if she sees a connection with Jules. "No" she replies, without hesitation. Jules' pant sparkles are in peril. She says she wants to get to know Nathan but hasn't been able to due to ~~her owner~~ Ivan.

Jules takes Ivan off to let him know if he gets a date card he's taking Tenille. Ivan, predictably, loses it. Jules is dead to him, and he goes to let off some steam by sipping a cocktail and dancing aggressively at the ocean.

Nothing like a calm down boogie to soothe the soul, right Ivan? #BachelorInParadiseAU pic.twitter.com/I8O5UUlKW4
— Bachelor In Paradise Australia (@BachParadiseAU) April 24, 2019

Source

Bachelor In Paradise Australia - Season 2 - Episodes - Sleuthing Spoilers

Richie and Cass come back and Richie takes Cass off straight away. Aww.

Jules does this:

Confusion, tears, and long sighs. Is this the end for Jules and Alisha? #BachelorInParadiseAU pic.twitter.com/NkWNOL02ki
— Bachelor In Paradise Australia (@BachParadiseAU) April 23, 2019

Bad Jules. Bad.

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Tenille comes up and tells him to stop being such a drama queen. "If you want to hang out with me, let's hang out", she says. Part of me thinks she's just using this as an opportunity to escape Ivan's clutches (although Jules would be an odd choice of bodyguard).

Preview for next ep. Ivan is a lunatic. Tenille looks like a Hollywood goddess. Jules stops the ceremony. Since we have screen caps of him & Alisha still to come, I presume he tells Tenille he doesn't want her rose. If Alisha picks him after all this, he's damn lucky, IMO.

SNEAK PEEK: Stock up on the popcorn Bach fam You’re going to need it for tonight’s rose ceremony. #BachelorInParadiseAU 7.30 on 10. pic.twitter.com/nPYdF8xTUk
— Bachelor In Paradise Australia (@BachParadiseAU) April 24, 2019

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