The Bachelor 20 - Ben Higgins - Episode 9 - Discussion - #2 *Sleuthing - Spoilers*

see2love wrote:As someone who isnt a Jojo or Lauren fan, i feel Jojo is more invested in Ben. She actually reminds me of Chris S as someone who has been there and nuturing towards Ben. She has been caring and always checking in with him while I get the impression Lauren just wants to win. She knows Ben has been chasing her all season and is happy to revel in his adoration. Ben will keep chasing her in their relationship going forward and it will be him working to make sure she stays with him.
but with JOjo he will have an equal who is as invested in making the relationship work and last.
Jmo

IMO Lauren has been lucky since the beginning that her and Ben found an instant connection from the get go. Even though she's on a reality show, the negative interpersonal elements that usually surface due to this environment, such as jealousy, intrigues, dishonesty between the contestants, and mainly competitiveness haven't really affected her because of that connection. it was like in real life when two people share mutual interests and want to get to know each other more. Her process of getting to know Ben has been perceived as smooth - she had one on ones when she has been only with Ben where he gave her 100% attention, and then during group dates she was always the one that Ben gave more attention to, thus decreasing the doubts she could potentially have had. This was very visible even to the rest of the girls, which made everyone insecure but Lauren. She has never experienced seeing Ben being more into anybody which is why she always came across as confident. And not in a cocky way, in a when you're being confident in a relationship with somebody without rubbing it in other people's faces way. I don't think she is there to win as you say, it's just there has never been any red flags for her to make her take a step back and make her struggle.. until now.

Well his blogs up. And it won't exactly give the Benlo fans comfort. Seems like big jojo love fest!

Jeepers wrote:Having rewatched and slept on it .. Some interesting observations .. Just a few .. Not all
- all the ?ILYs .. Huge difference in the emotion behind them .. Lauren's more gente  and sweeter and emotional .. JoJo more direct with less emotion .. And word dubbing on a couple of those for sure
- Lauren showing more doubt in upcoming previews .. She has a thumb .. So to speak .. On the possibility that Ben can love 2 .. JoJo more confident .. And a bit snide .. as noted by her facial expressions at the RC
- Ben appears to come a bit clean with Lauren in the previews .. Sitting on the beach .. Will also create more doubt for Lauren .. As we see with the tears and her comments in the preview
- Bens comment to Lauren about what he has done wrong is very telling
- Lauren .. Ben has the strongest emotional attachment .. JoJo .. Ben has a huge physical attachment

Just some thoughts

Jeepers you seem to be channeling my mind this morning. I too noticed a big difference in the feelings behind the words. Love expressing a rather complex set of feelings but without those feelings the word is pretty meaningless. I also believe that Ben came clean with Lauren before he proposed.

Because of the complexity of feelings that make up what we consider love, all the "love" that we feel is not created equal. What's compelling to me about this season is that we are watching people sort all this out.

Yeah, I didn't love that blog. Ben is losing me.

Ok, the interview on GMA is literally everything we saw on Twitter, nothing more. Meh.

His blog basically confirms to me that he is a tool!

Ben just keeps digging the hole deeper and deeper. Ben, shhhhh!

see2love wrote:His blog basically confirms to me that he is a tool!

I hate to agree, but I kinda do. I wanted a little more acknowledgment about the bad place he put both women in. Maybe a little more remorse for getting carried away... Or something. It was just all kinds of me, me, me.

I wouldn't really say he's a tool. I think he was being dumb and reckless and not thinking of the ramifications of his words, but I don't think he was intentionally leading them on. He just doesn't know how to keep his emotions to himself and has some growing up to do.

I think Ben should have taken a cue from Kaitlyn when he came to the blogs! He is killing me so far. You can tell that he took each relationship individually but he still needs to guard his words. Heck, the girl he let go he still said was perfect! I hope whoever is his F1 (still thinking Lauren but who knows) has very think skin and is very secure in their relationship or it will never work IMO.

sosleepy wrote:

see2love wrote:His blog basically confirms to me that he is a tool!

I hate to agree, but I kinda do. I wanted a little more acknowledgment about the bad place he put both women in. Maybe a little more remorse for getting carried away... Or something. It was just all kinds of me, me, me.

Yup. Still singing the same me me me perfect me song. I would be livid as the F2 reading it. Just stop being perfectly politically correct for a minute but I guess he still wants the world to love him.

KBiegs88 wrote:Well his blogs up. And it won't exactly give the Benlo fans comfort. Seems like big jojo love fest!

Woah you're right!  I've been trying not to go there in my mind because it'll be a long 2 weeks but without the spoiler  - from the ep last night, the preview for the finale and that blog I would be pretty sure Jojo is F1 right about now.