Becca Tilley - Bachelor 19 - Discussion - #8

Yeah I'm sure she loves Dez as a friend but I don't think she was saying she was in love with him at all in those (embarrassing) texts. This seems more like one friend telling another friend she loves him because he cares about making her feel better when she's upset.

To me it seemed pretty obvious that Becca had sent him drunk texts the night before being like "tell me I'm pretty! Why don't you want to be with me! Why don't you love me!" I always got the impression that she was IN love with him and they would be together if he was into her as much as she was into him. She pretty much said the latter part to Chris. Yeah, "ugh I love you l o l" is open to interpretation, but I took it to mean "crap, I love you. Why can't I get over you and be into someone who actually wants me". I think that if Becca had never been in love with Dez, she wouldn't STILL be hung up on the guy after years and years of on-and-off dating and him making it clear he doesn't want more than friendship. She used to tweet and pin all these "he doesn't deserve you!" and "forgiveness" type of quotes that I always felt like were her way of getting over Dez.


JMO.

(source: single 25 y/o girl who has seen her fair share of drunken texts/obsessive tweeting and pinning with girls still in love with their ex's)

I think a lot can be seen from the lens of one's own life experiences but I don't see that text by Becca that way, especially considering the evidence provided doesn't show Becca saying she was/is in love with Dez at all.

I just see it as a girl texting her guy friend who cares about her and I don't see much romance there between them other than a close friendship.

Since @RammerJammer91 knows Becca personally as well, I think it only adds to the evidence that Becca has never been in love.

jmo

As much as I appreciate when close friends and family members of contestants come on, there is definitely a bias present to believe and support every word they say.  Like, how RammerJammer said that she doesn't enjoy the limelight in a previous post. Even as a fan, I can see that she enjoys it or else she wouldn't constantly be SC-ing, periscoping, IG-ing, tweeting, doing modeling shoots, hanging out with socialites, actresses, models, ex-alum, etc. Just because you're an introvert and a friendly person doesn't mean you don't like the attention. If RammerJammer can be "wrong" about that, I think she can be wrong about other things as well. I also think that "being in love" is mostly a semantics thing. Whether Becca personally described it as love or not, she was really, really, really into Dez for a very long time.


ETA: It's not really a big deal and worthy discussing/arguing over. My main point was that I think that if Becca was actually into a guy, time wouldn't be an issue for her. The reason that things didn't work out with Chris/Becca was because Chris wasn't the guy for Becca, not being of her being hesitant of falling in love or moving too slow or anything like that. If she does go on Ben's season, I think we'll see a pretty different Becca than we saw on Chris's.

JMO.

I do think there is a bias, but it still stands that the evidence presented as fact for Becca saying she was in love is not evidence since she never said that. Anything RammerJammer has said is just corroborating this. jmo

I guess the best way to put it is that she loved, and still loves who Dez is as a person. He's a great guy. He's well-mannered, a christian, supportive, etc. Those are some of the qualities that she loved about him. But she was never in love with him. She did have stronger feelings for him, but those feelings weren't love, and he was never in love with her. They were on and off for a while and they were long distance. Hell, she has never been in a relationship on Valentine's, Christmas, or her birthday with Dez or anyone else, for that matter. She doesn't view him as anything more than a friend, and he feels the same way.

Becca even told Chris's mom that she loves people easily, she just hasn't fallen in love. I get that. She seems to have a lot of love for all her friends and family, but that's not the same thing as romantic love. You can't really force romantic love to happen.

At the same time, I can't help but wonder if she's waiting for something that will never happen. Not everyone feels love the same way and from my experience, falling in love gets harder the older you get. But maybe she's just saving her feelings for the right guy, who knows.

I don't think Becca is immature. She is only 27 and enjoying life, as she should be as a single beautiful young lady. On the contrary she showed much maturity on the show IMO and even if I don't follow every one of her tweets, I've seen some very nice and profound ones regarding her family.
I liked Becca during the show and still do.
I don't mind if she goes back on the show ; I can understand that after having a great previous experience where she met now close girlfriends and maybe fell or almost fell in love, she would be tempted to give it another try. Just like so many other contestants.

A tweet a little while ago from her sister:

@CMTilley
Sitting at work reading articles about Bec going back on the bachelor & I'm like "hmm.. She hasn't told me that" 
Where does this come from?

CaliGirl88 wrote:A tweet a little while ago from her sister:

@CMTilley
Sitting at work reading articles about Bec going back on the bachelor & I'm like "hmm.. She hasn't told me that" 
Where does this come from?

I'm still standing by what I posted about a month ago that she won't be back on. I haven't heard anything that even remotely supports her going back on the show. The people that I've talked to would know. If she does end up going back on, she will have done one hell of a misdirecting job.

I will also say this, and I'll preface this by saying that this is not directed at anyone on here. I don't scroll through every page of Becca's threads, so I don't know everything that every user has said. It's more so directed at people who call her out on social media for promoting products every now and then.

She gets paid pretty well for advertising products and gets free gear. I can tell you that she gets a TON of offers. She could be promoting at least 5 different products every day if she wanted to...EASILY. But she has chosen not to do so. If only people knew how many offers she gets and the things she has turned down, especially the latter. The honest truth is she doesn't want this to define her. She's not trying to be "in." Pretty much every single former cast member or celebrity has been the one to initiate contact with her. She hasn't been going above and beyond reaching out to past cast members to stay "famous." The same can't be said for several people that have reached out to her.

Thanks RJ91 for the info. We always appreciate friends and family posting along with us.

I wish I was being contacted to promote products, I'd do it in a minute!   I don't understand why that appears to be a negative thing.