Re: Juan Pablo & Nikki Ferrell - Fan Forum - Discussion - Couples Therapy Premier Sept 10 2014

[stuckinsc]

I still like Nikki a lot and appreciate the fact that she is an introvert. I am still confused by her choice to do the bachelor in the first place and do wonder if she was willing to do it for JPG, much like Cat was willing to do it only for Sean.

I don't think Nikki or JPG are perfect and hopefully he will learn to respect her need for quiet and alone time, but it would help if she could just tell him. Maybe a simple, right now I need quiet time to figure myself out, I love you and will talk when I am ready. But just getting angry and lashing out at others doesn't help.

Hopefully, this will be a break through. JPG can learn to ease up and go bounce around on his own when he needs to and to let Nikki do her thing and be grateful when she is ready to be open.

I will say, if Nikki wants to enjoy the perks of fame, such as the trip to Bali, then she does need to learn to be more graceful about the difficult parts. I bet she has and we have to remember we are still seeing her at the beginning of this process.

BTW, I can see that Jenna is much more difficult than Nikki. I guess for me, Jenna is a self indulgent narcissist, so I don't care or expect better from her. I adore Nikki and most things about her, so for me it was sad to see her lash out at the camera people and such who were just doing their jobs. That is not called for.

[metalgirl]

I sincerely hope the last person Nikki takes relationship advice from is Jenna Jameson.  Nikki is 26, JJ is 40.  JJ has lived an entire lifetime already, while Nikki is just getting started.  

While it can be valuable to get advice from someone who has already had a full career, long-term committed relationships and children, it can also be badly skewed.  Instead of receiving thoughtful insight on how to build and nurture new relationships, and help you navigate those first years together, you can possibly get all those negative and reactionary "words of wisdom".   Jenna seems to come from a place of negativity, but that is probably no surprise, given her past.  

As long as Nikki is careful about who she listens to, she can really grow from this experience.

[SerenityGirl]

We don't really know how  much complaining Nikki actually did about the cameras. We know what the editing is showing us. It has been made a focal point of contention for her. I would love to hear from people who have known Nik for a long time talk about her and who she is. She's been torn down by the media based on the editing of two "reality" tv shows that may or may not be presenting reality. She is an introvert. That doesn't mean that she is unfriendly or hard to get along with. It means that her energy comes from her alone time and one on one time with significant others and quiet times that's why she needs to have a place to go to, like their private quarters, to rejuvenate. She needs to be able to change clothes w/o "entertaining." She becomes exhausted and out of that, irritable. She is probably working hard to keep up with the most gregarious and outgoing bunch she has been around in while because they are all involved in entertainment except Chris and have much more experience than she does. In one spot she was trying to explain that where she comes things are very different. This transition and relearning is hard work. She's not being heard and as an introvert that hurts in a great way because it takes so much effort to speak out about herself personally. She wants to but it is difficult when she has to contend for the space to do it.  Bottom line whatever "acting out" that appears, Nikki is very hurt. Looking back at the scenes from the final rose it is evident but she sucked it up and for
lots of reasons. Another counselor commented on Dr. Jenn's twitter that Nikki appeared to have "settled" for "I like you alot" and who does that? And that is a great question. She also said she appeared not to feel significant as I recall. I hope this can all break open for Nikki and get the grief that is there really out but that's tuff for her. Juan on the other hand gets his energy from people and activity as an obvious extrovert. He gets defensive with anything that will try to take that from him and becomes contentious and condescending because he believes his way is the best when actually they are just different. He needs to respect Nikki's need for privacy and alone time and have his interviews elsewhere than their room. He will get what he needs from the attention of the interview and she will get the rejuvenating down time she needs to do the work of Couples Therapy. And, yes. I know she signed up for the show and she is letting reality show up. It took a lot more for her to come on this show than it did Juan. The cost is much greater to her. I hope that Nikki reaps the rewards of her efforts. Kudos to her for her courage and bravery. My two cents.

Great great great post!

As an introvert I can totally relate to Nikki. Hopefully this latest Reality show experience has allowed her to self reflect and learn to deal with things more graciously under pressure.

[Prd2brdhd]

The hardest thing for me to watch was the way she treated Juan Pablo. He was constantly touching her and trying to connect with her and she just pushed him away. I only saw her seem to act lovingly with him once and that is when she first came out of the individual session with Dr Jenn. She responded lovingly when he had waited for her to go to dinner and she said she wanted to talk to him later ..but she never did. I was shocked by her behavior and would never have suspected she would act like that. It is so not like my prior image of her. I realize a lot of it is editing and they highlighted the negatives... but it sure put a different spin on the things JPG has said before that I didn't take seriously. It also made me think the women on the Bachelor that complained about her being so negative were telling the truth... which I didn't get at the time. Nikki seemed so immature last night; I really hope she gets something from this therapy. I'm also really disappointed that she is ruling out Miami to live. That would make it so hard for Juan Pablo to continue his close relationship with his daughter... and that should be his first priority. Anyway, I love these two and I hope it will work out and this therapy works, but I am not as hopeful as I once was.

[Isabel123]

We don't really know how  much complaining Nikki actually did about the cameras. We know what the editing is showing us. It has been made a focal point of contention for her. I would love to hear from people who have known Nik for a long time talk about her and who she is. She's been torn down by the media based on the editing of two "reality" tv shows that may or may not be presenting reality. She is an introvert. That doesn't mean that she is unfriendly or hard to get along with. It means that her energy comes from her alone time and one on one time with significant others and quiet times that's why she needs to have a place to go to, like their private quarters, to rejuvenate. She needs to be able to change clothes w/o "entertaining." She becomes exhausted and out of that, irritable. She is probably working hard to keep up with the most gregarious and outgoing bunch she has been around in while because they are all involved in entertainment except Chris and have much more experience than she does. In one spot she was trying to explain that where she comes things are very different. This transition and relearning is hard work. She's not being heard and as an introvert that hurts in a great way because it takes so much effort to speak out about herself personally. She wants to but it is difficult when she has to contend for the space to do it.  Bottom line whatever "acting out" that appears, Nikki is very hurt. Looking back at the scenes from the final rose it is evident but she sucked it up and for
lots of reasons. Another counselor commented on Dr. Jenn's twitter that Nikki appeared to have "settled" for "I like you alot" and who does that? And that is a great question. She also said she appeared not to feel significant as I recall. I hope this can all break open for Nikki and get the grief that is there really out but that's tuff for her. Juan on the other hand gets his energy from people and activity as an obvious extrovert. He gets defensive with anything that will try to take that from him and becomes contentious and condescending because he believes his way is the best when actually they are just different. He needs to respect Nikki's need for privacy and alone time and have his interviews elsewhere than their room. He will get what he needs from the attention of the interview and she will get the rejuvenating down time she needs to do the work of Couples Therapy. And, yes. I know she signed up for the show and she is letting reality show up. It took a lot more for her to come on this show than it did Juan. The cost is much greater to her. I hope that Nikki reaps the rewards of her efforts. Kudos to her for her courage and bravery. My two cents.

Very well said.  You made me think about things I ignore while watching the show.  

Love your post Carolina. And i agree with Soccer3m i tend to focus on what was shown briefly on the show. I forgot that being an introvert it must be hard for Nikki to expose herself 24 hrs a day on the camera. Yes she know what she is signing for but still it's not easy to open up for everyone to know your private thoughts.

[Isabel123]

I've got tons of screen shots and will post by batch.

[Isabel123]

[Isabel123]

[Isabel123]

[Isabel123]

[soccerm3m]

There are lots of people on twitter saying they like the Juan a Pablo they are seeing on Couples Therapy as compared to the one they saw on The Bachelor but they are hating Nikki. It had to be do hard. She went on the show to help his image which appears to be happening but her image is now taking a beating. I sure hope we see a different Nikki in the weeks to come. I wonder if she watched the episode. I think it would be hard to watch.

[Nabsie]

JP favorited a tweet where some girl told him he needs a good girl who gets him. Weird.

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