Ashley and J.P - Media - No Discussion

Going into this final week, I was feeling certainty with my decision and was excited for my family to meet both Ben and J.P.

I still had a few unresolved concerns, but I knew my sister would provide me the insight that I needed. Not only that, seeing my family at this point was going to be the exact thing I needed. Being away from your normal life, friends and family for as long as I had been, you feel alone. I could not wait to see them!

I thought my family would love both of these guys – who wouldn't? But to my surprise, my sister, the person I was looking forward to seeing the most, had a very strong opinion about J.P. I didn't need for my family to see everything right away and confirm my feelings, but I did need support from them. My sister told me that J.P. wasn't the one for me even before she had even sat down to talk to him!

Of course, this was a shock to me and immediately I felt emotional. I didn't understand how she could feel this strongly without even talking to him! You would think she would quietly be cautious and ask questions to resolve her uncertainty. Nope, she told J.P. straight out that he wasn't the one for me. What bothered me the most was not that she didn't approve, but how aggressive and unsupportive she was. All I needed at this point was someone to be supportive of whatever I was feeling ... and she wasn't.

In a way, it made me feel alone and full of questions. Was there something I wasn't seeing? Was my heart leading me in the wrong direction again? These are all questions I had only a few days to figure out.
Ben Meets the Parents

After this family date with J.P. crashed and burned, I had no idea what to expect with Ben. He is such a likable guy so I figured my family would love him. They did. This date went so smoothly! Though my sister still wasn't convinced Ben was the right one for me either, she was more supportive of this relationship. She felt as if I was more like myself around Ben. I subconsciously wanted my family to tell me that J.P. was the one for me, and I was crushed when my sister didn't approve, even though the rest of my family did. This alone showed me that I had to use the rest of the time I had to reevaluate my relationships so I could feel 100 percent confident in my decision, even if it meant going home without either man.

One might think that these family dates would lead me to feel so uncertain about J.P., but it made me realize that I had to trust myself and my feelings. I couldn't be influenced by what my sister had to say. I used her uncertainty to make me ask the questions I was scared to ask, but by no means did it change the way I felt about him. I always said that it is important to judge people based on what YOU know of them, and to take other people's opinions or warnings with a grain of salt.

The first time I did this I was wrong, but this time, I was so right. There were definitely times along this journey that I thought I could marry Ben and have a very exciting life with him. He is an incredible man – smart, charismatic, hilarious, warm and thoughtful. I pictured a life with him and knew we had a very special connection and comfort with one another that I want to have with my husband. But there was some feeling that was missing when I was with him that I always had with J.P. – and I knew I didn't want to lose that feeling.

You would think that the hardest part about this was trying to figure out who you loved but in the end, the hardest part was trying to figure out how to say goodbye to someone you really care about. Once I knew I would be saying goodbye to Ben, I didn't know how to act. My heart ached knowing that I would be causing heartbreak to someone. I've always preferred being broken up with than having to do it.
The Big Day

Waking up on proposal day, I had a mix of emotions. I had feelings of anxiety and relief. Anxiety knowing that I had to say goodbye and potentially hurt someone I care about, and relief knowing that everything was drawing to an end. I regained confidence in my ability to find a great man, and this is exactly what I had found. The proposal setting was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen. As Ben walked up, I did not know what to say, or how to act. I was speechless. Having to say goodbye to Ben was the hardest thing I've probably ever done in my life. And his reaction was certainly not what I expected. Then again, in a situation like this, you never know what to expect. I felt awful. It killed me to know I hurt him as much I did. I thought, how could I go ahead and find such happiness on a day that I caused Ben so much pain? I knew I had to clear my mind and refocus my energy on J.P. I wanted that day to be the most romantic day of my life. I knew as soon as I saw J.P.'s gorgeous smile, all would be well. And it certainly was!

Watching the proposal and all that followed I have a couple things to say: One, I completely fumbled over my words when I was trying to tell J.P. how much I loved him at the proposal. He says it's a moment that he will never forget, and he wishes everyone had been able to see it. It was pretty hilarious. And two, the montage brought tears to both of our eyes. We are so grateful to have our love story documented for the world to see, and want to thank everyone for the support and love.

I also want to say a personal thank you to Cassie Lambert, Alycia Rossiter, Ashley Spivey and Ali Fedotowsky for being such a great support system and offering words of wisdom through the hard times. Thank you from the bottom of my heart.
After the Final Rose

I was not sure how seeing Ben at the After the Final Rose special would be. The last time we spoke, he was angry and told me that things don't really end unless they end badly. I hoped his mindset had changed since then. I felt a sense of calmness when I walked onstage. As soon as we said hello, I had a feeling things would go well. It's always hard to tell someone that you once cared about that you fell in love with someone else. I don't think there is a good way to say that, but my goal was to be honest and open with him and provide him with the closure that he might need. Talking to Ben felt like old times. We were even joking around a bit. I answered his questions as honestly as I could and I think the meeting went as best as it could have. I wish him the best and thank him for being such an important part of this journey. I know even though things turned out this way, he learned so much about himself and has opened himself to love again. I wish him great love in the near future!

Bachelorette' Winner: Ashley's "Smokin' Hot With a Great Ass"

ABC News
(NEW YORK) – There are a lot of things that newly-engaged JP Rosenbaum loves about his new fiancée, Bachelorette star Ashley Hebert. And speaking to ABC News Radio’s David Blaustein on Tuesday, the 34-year-old construction manager from New York wasn’t shy when asked to name some Hebert’s best assets.

After rattling off some of the typical responses – “she brings out the best in me,” “we just work,” and “we complement each other perfectly,” Hebert nudged Rosenbaum, and quietly reminded him of her good looks.

"Oh yeah,” Rosenbaum said. “And she's smokin' hot with a great ass!"

“Baby!” Hebert exclaimed, appearing startled by Rosenbaum’s choice of words.

The former Bachelorette contestant asked Blaustein, “I can say that?”

"There's no turning back now,” Rosenbaum said.

“She is absolutely gorgeous,” Rosenbaum conceded. “The attraction was there from the get-go."

Hebert, a 26-year-old aspiring dentist who lives in Philadelphia, accepted Rosenbaum’s marriage proposal on Monday’s season finale of ABC's The Bachelorette. JP popped the question after Ashley turned down a proposal from the other finalist, 28-year-old winemaker Ben F. of Sonoma, Calif.

Unlucky-in-love hunk J.P. Rosenbaum won the heart of Ashley Hebert on ABC’s “The Bachelorette” the other night, and no one is happier for him than a Newton homegal who tossed him overboard 11 years ago for another guy!

Stacey Klein, now a stay-at-home mother of two living in Needham, dated Rosenbaum for three months in 2000 during a post-college stint in New York. The couple met through friends and “had a lot of fun together” until Stacey’s ex wanted to get back together ...

“I know, I was silly back then,” Klein told the Track. “But we had a great time. J.P. was funny, charming, real smart and loved to go out, although we spent a lot of time just enjoying each other’s company.”

Stace also said she remembers Rosenbaum, who hails from an upper middle class family on Long Island, was “very into his body.”

“I remember one night he ate pizza and was really, really mad at himself,” said Klein. “I thought it was a bit strange for a guy in his early 20s to be worried about eating pizza.”

On the relationship side, Klein said J.P. “attached himself very quickly to women,” so it stands to reason he’d fall hard and bruise easily when things didn’t work out.

“He had a tendency to get sulky,” said the South African-born Stacey, who denies being the woman whom the construction supervisor referenced during the reality show for “breaking his heart.”

“Oh, no, no, no, that wasn’t me,” said Klein, who, along with 10.2 million others, tuned in Monday night to watch her old flame propose to the University of Pennsylvania dental student on a beach in Fiji.

“I know he was ambitious, but I didn’t get the feeling from him that he wanted to be famous,” said J.P.’s ex. “Maybe he had a real bad relationship or got sick of the scene and circle of women in New York.

“I do know he probably loved the travel aspect of the show since he is a worldly kind of guy,” she laughed. “This is funny, but he loved my accent and would always say, ‘Talk to me.’ ”

So why propose to a plain jane from Madawaska, Maine?

“I saw some chemistry there,” said Klein, who admits she found Ashley’s constant hair-twirling “really annoying.”

“When Bentley had left her and she was vulnerable without makeup and without her glasses, I think he saw a different side to her and connected with her on that level. I hope it works out. I really do.”

Yesterday, during an appearance on “Good Morning America,” Hebert told host Robin Roberts that she and her fiance intend to prove the skeptics wrong about their TV coupling.

“Definitely,” agreed J.P. “This is something special.”