Jef Holm - Bachelorette 8 - Discussion

I'd venture to say that Emily & Jef were GREAT television (for those of us who fell under Jef's spell). I bought his every line and thought it was one of the greatest love stories on the show from their London date to best HTD ever. My love affair (with their love affair) turned from following their every move to having a truly sick feeling in my stomach when Reality Steve broke the news followed by US article and more. Say what you will about RS, he generally gets the truth.

Jef is a great salesman, a creative thinker, a charmer and the definition of a chameleon with a seemingly limitless trust fund.

So ... in some ways I do think Jef would make an engaging Bachelor BUT I don't think that I'd watch. I just wouldn't believe anything coming out of his mouth and would feel sorry for all of the girls who fell in love with him.

I'd agree with you as to his limitless trust fund.

I have to say I truly disagree on that characterization of Jef and Emily and Jef's relationship. After the first US Weekly article broke and Emily was sexting or texting Matt Leinart, Jef never left Emily's side and threw his brother under the bus even though we later found out he was telling the truth - he defended her and stood by her. Jef then packed up all his belongings, rented an apartment in Charlotte and moved across country for her. He hung out with Ricki, coached her soccer team, went to her cheerleading games, taught her to ride a bike ... I believe that Jef and Emily did have issues and had a hard time figuring out how to make their lifestyles mesh so that they both could be happy. I think they fought and Jef fled to Utah and kissed his ex. I believe he immediately regretted it and flew back, but it was too late. They did book a wedding venue and they were making plans to marry but I think the pressure just all became too much. If you followed Jef during the time of the break up you would see true pain in him. He tried again and again, lost a ton of weight, and according to sources had a mini breakdown. All fall up until New Years, he and Emily talked and tried to work it out a few times. This was very much two people who loved each other very much and were trying to figure things out under a lot of outside pressure. I am sad that they couldn't. But that doesn't mean that it was fake or that the love wasn't real or that Jef wasn't who we saw on the show.
I agree that Jef currently travels a lot and seems a lot less focused career wise than he once did. I think he needs to find his passion again and he does seem a little lost. But he is not travelling around looking for teeny boppers. He mostly hangs out with very close friends like TR and Ali or his sister Julie, who he lives with, and their friends, who are great people. We do not see reports of him hooking up with anybody, beyond a few kisses here and there. Honestly, he does seem to be floating a bit and he definitely is not dating anyone seriously at all ... but he is single and free to date and hang out and that's what he's doing.

I don't think they initially were pretending in the way that I think Deanna "had" to choose Jesse, but I do think they stayed together a bit longer and pretended like everything was perfect so the fairytale wouldn't come crashing down so abruptly.

I don't think Jef was ready to commit and my main beef with him now is that he still wants to portray this guy looking for his soulmate because he just loves love and is a hopeless romantic. I don't think he's a terrible person, but I just wish he'd drop the act. Or maybe he's auditioning for The Bachelor?

Recently he mentioned on Twitter that casting for The Bachelor is his dream job. What? Since when? From humanitarian relief work to work on this crazy show? Who is this guy? Help me Jen!

I like Jef. I did when he was on the show and I still see good in him today. I just didn't see a lifetime of him and Em together. Em wasn't ready. I think I watch this show a little differently than some people. I watch to be entertained because I don't hold out hope for many marriages ( if any more) coming out of this show at all. It's the abnormal when we do get a marriage out it.

Jef and Em were good TV. They kept me entertained for several months on a show that I love to watch, but more in the way RS does than a diehard thinking "oh they will wind up getting married" kind of way. What these people do in their everyday life in really of no concern to me coz it doesn't effect the flow of my everyday life and I have no way off really knowing at the end of the day what's in any of their hearts. KWIM?..

I would totally watch Jef as the next Bach. I think he would make for a rockin season of it. I enjoy watching him. There's just something about him.. Do I think he would be doing it for the right reasons and that he would wind up getting married after the show.. Ummm no, I don't, but then I rarely think that about any of them. I leave that for them to prove me wrong..

I noticed something about Dez in the last video I saw of her last night. I'm terribly afraid she is gonna come off as too much of another Ali and I sure hope and pray I'm wrong about that. Coz I've always liked Dez.. I didn't enjoy Ali's season. I couldn't stand the way she tried to talk, the way she mumbled her words and everything was a giggle to her.

Anyway, I've rambled on long enough. ; )

Recently he mentioned on Twitter that casting for The Bachelor is his dream job. What? Since when?

It doesnt surprise me in the least. They'll never have him though. 1F didnt think that the rules applied to his lordship. He spoiled the ending with his tweets and igram photos. They arent going to hire someone who thinks the rules are written for the little people, but not for him. He's uncontrollable and they know it.

Amberish wrote:

-SarahP wrote:

Amberish wrote:Perhaps there are those that are Arie fans, but that is not me. I represent those Bachelor fans that was impressed by Jef before noticing that beyond his smooth snake oil salesman exterior lies nothing of substance.

Emily dumped Jef for cheating after a tabloid reported Jef hooking up with one of his "multiple" girlfriends when leaving to participate on the Bachelorette, but she was obviously disenchanted long before and easily pinpointed to the time of Ashley and JP's not so flattering remarks after producer Cassie Lambert's wedding.

Subsequent, People Water, a company Jef founded, unceremoniously dumped Jef. There is certainly a story there, and I doubt it would be anything flattering towards Jef given his besty dumping him, too, after openly making a twitter alliance with Emily.

In my opinion, there are two types of Jef fans: Those like me that came to see the light (and at least slightly repulsed for having fallen for a too good to be true smooth talker) and those that are still blinking ...

Hi :Smiley: Could you tell something more about what Ashley & JP's remarks were about Jef & Emily after Cassie's wedding? I haven't heard that yet and I'm curious!

It wasn't so much what they said, but, rather, how it came across. I can't find the video and the published (edited) transcribed isn't truly telling.

Anyway, what I recall is Ashley and JP towing the company line about the couple looking as if in love. However, JP was clearly taken aback when asked about spending time with the Emily and Jef, and the response about having more in common with Ben and Courtney seem to come off as a "save". It was just such an awkward moment.

In retrospect, it all makes sense as we know from various sources that from the time they were in NY, ready to fly to Africa, until Emily gave her story to People, they tried but it wasn't working.

Emily and Jef's relationship parallels DeAnna and Jesse Csincsak in nearly all respects --- good television, but never a real love story.

I saw the interview too. From what I recall, JP did have a slight reaction with that question. I took it more as, he would not spend time with the couple because of how different they were. At that time, Jef and Emily were doing soccer matches with the kids, going to the mall, cheerleading camps for Rickie and babysitting other children. I am sure those stories were shared at the wedding. My interpretation was that JP wouldn't be doing that stuff, and is at a different life stage- hanging out in bars, going out with friends without kids. (Friends like Ben and Courtney)

While I realize that Jef is now back to life as a single guy, at the time he was moving to Charlotte and doing new step-dad activities like putting together bikes for an 8 yr old. I don't think this sounded like JPs idea of fun.

mare2 wrote:I don't think they initially were pretending in the way that I think Deanna "had" to choose Jesse, but I do think they stayed together a bit longer and pretended like everything was perfect so the fairytale wouldn't come crashing down so abruptly.

I don't think Jef was ready to commit and my main beef with him now is that he still wants to portray this guy looking for his soulmate because he just loves love and is a hopeless romantic. I don't think he's a terrible person, but I just wish he'd drop the act. Or maybe he's auditioning for The Bachelor?

Recently he mentioned on Twitter that casting for The Bachelor is his dream job. What? Since when? From humanitarian relief work to work on this crazy show? Who is this guy? Help me Jen!

LOL! I love ya Mare! I think that comment on twitter was totally a joke. Like someone saying judging the Miss America pagent would be their dream job. I would like to know, though, what project he's working on next for sure, whether its Alterra Pest Control, or something else. I think we want to identify him with some kind of humanitarian work cause he's always been associated with People Water before. It's such a part of his identity. I am waiting anxiously to hear! I do believe hes up to something though because up until a couple of weeks ago, he seemed to be quiet and busy during the work days and was only spotted out maybe at lunch. Then he tweeted about his meeting with Alterra Pest Control.

tigertiz wrote:

Recently he mentioned on Twitter that casting for The Bachelor is his dream job. What? Since when?

It doesnt surprise me in the least. They'll never have him though. 1F didnt think that the rules applied to his lordship. He spoiled the ending with his tweets and igram photos. They arent going to hire someone who thinks the rules are written for the little people, but not for him. He's uncontrollable and they know it.

Very good point. I think they also know that he's not anywhere near settling down for real.

albean99 wrote:

tigertiz wrote:

Recently he mentioned on Twitter that casting for The Bachelor is his dream job. What? Since when?

It doesnt surprise me in the least. They'll never have him though. 1F didnt think that the rules applied to his lordship. He spoiled the ending with his tweets and igram photos. They arent going to hire someone who thinks the rules are written for the little people, but not for him. He's uncontrollable and they know it.

Very good point. I think they also know that he's not anywhere near settling down for real.

I can't see them ever asking Jef to be the Bach, but I'd watch him. LOL

I can see tp recruiting Jef as bach since they are wanting to attract a younger demographic. He could bring them in.

Do you really think so, BKay? My young co-workers liked Sean & Arie but Jef wasn't on their radar until near the end. For me he'd be another Jake but with money.